Motherhood and Entrepreneurship

The Gotham Gal wrote a post last week about motherhood and work. In it she argued that motherhood is a given for many/most women and that it hasn't gotten in the way of many great accomplishments by women over the years and we should not penalize women for the fact that they have another side project that they will be doing for the rest of their lives. She ended the post with the assertion that women were designed for this and that they thrive on it.

I've watched the Gotham Gal go right back to work a week after our first child was born because it was a startup and they needed her. She managed it pretty well. We used to swap days we had to be home early to relieve Betty (our child caregiver at the time). I've watched her take on another startup working in an office in the basement of our house selling ad space in between driving the kids here and there. And as she says in the post, she always had dinner on the table, always made sure the kids had what they needed, and always made sure our home was functioning. She still does that even though she's got something like a couple dozen projects going right now.

So on Mother's Day, I'd like to acknowledge that motherhood is simply a fact of life for many/most women and that it should not be a hurdle for women entrepreneurs. We just need the men in their lives (husbands, cofounders, investors, etc) to be supportive of their side project. It's a damn important one.

And on that note, I'm waking up the kids and going out to get stuff to make breakfast for our women entrepreneur and mother. Happy mothers day everyone.

#VC & Technology

Comments (Archived):

  1. RichardF

    It was a great post by Gotham earlier in the week. + 1 for motherhood not getting in the way of either a woman’s career or being an entrepreneur.Marriage is the ultimate partnership, particularly once children come along. My wife supports me in what I’m doing and I like to think I support my wife 100% in her career.Any guy that still believes a woman’s place is in the home is living in the Jurassic age.

    1. fredwilson


    2. Guest

      Gotham Gal’s post was very good. I didn’t come across until a day or so later after reading some of Brad Feld’s tweets. My wife does not do the blogging/Twitter ‘thing’ so I just showed her the article later on … of course, she dug it too.Regarding your marriage comment – spot on … good show!I grew up in a household where my mother had to be a Superhero … literally not just figuratively. To this day I do not know how she did everything she did for all of us kids. And 99.99% of the time she did it with a smile on here face. Moms are amazing!

  2. Dave Pinsen

    Hope someone’s making breakfast for Betty this morning too.

    1. fredwilson

      That’s an interesting topic dave. We haven’t been in touch with Bettyrecently. She stopped working for us when we briefly moved out of the city17 years ago. We stayed in touch for a number of years. Betty was fromTrinidad and Tobago and her kids were there living with her mother. Iremember vividly coming home one day and Betty was distraught. She keptsaying “the father of my children died” we put her on a plane so she couldgo home and be with her kids. Its a different culture and way of life. I’vegot a bunch of stories about Betty. She is a great person

      1. Dave Pinsen

        That was kind of you.The topic came to mind recently when reading an Evelyn Waugh novel. I wrote a blog post about it last month: “A Handful of Dust”.

        1. RichardF

          Great book Dave, I’m a big fan of Evelyn Waugh, in fact you’ve inspired me to dig out my Waugh novels and reread them.

          1. Dave Pinsen

            Relatively new to him, but what a writer.

        2. Donna Brewington White

          Thanks for bringing this post to attention. Liked it.Hey, it’s still the weekend. What are you doing on the internet?

          1. Dave Pinsen

            Broke the Internet fast this weekend. Will have to take a short break from it tonight and then get back on track next weekend.

      2. ShanaC

        It would be a totally interesting post (though perhaps not here) about how you dealt with help. There has been a lot of writing recently about nannys because of the Royal Wedding – and not a lot of it is practical…

      3. Tereza

        We’ve been co-parenting with Maurine for 8 years. We are a team and she is family.She was with the family before for 13 years. Actually, it was a single mom who ran her business which included heavy travel. Need I say she’s the most important hiring decision I’ve made so far. And I’ve had a pretty long professional life.We were only allowed to interview her after the previous mom/employer interviewed us. Grilled us. I called lots of references. And even made sure to meet the daughter — would I like the kind of person she is?I never, ever undermine Maurine in front of the children.We get each other flowers for Mother’s Day. We have her on health insurance. When she needed surgery on a (thankfully, benign) tumor, I was the one next to her when she woke up in the hospital.I am very, very possessive of Maurine, and pity the fool who’d try to poach her from me.It’s a relationship my husband and I have worked hard on and are proud of. My husband and I think it reflects the kind of people, entrepreneurs and managers we are. It does not come cheap.Unfortunately in the startup world, this is called ‘overhead’. I call it what I need to be optimally focused on what needs to get done.I would love to see a fund that provides ‘childcare grants’ for startup moms, so they can play on a level field with non-parents. It’s rare that a husband’s salary can support this. An entrepreneur mom must at least earn enough to cover this. There is pushback.Yes, figuring out childcare would unlock a ton of new value in this country targeted intelligently after the people who control 85% of spending. It’s the elephant in the room.

        1. Shuba S.

          “My husband and I think it reflects the kind of people, entrepreneurs and managers we are. It does not come cheap.Unfortunately in the startup world, this is called ‘overhead’. I call it what I need to be optimally focused on what needs to get done.I would love to see a fund that provides ‘childcare grants’ for startup moms, so they can play on a level field with non-parents. It’s rare that a husband’s salary can support this. An entrepreneur mom must at least earn enough to cover this. There is pushback.Yes, figuring out childcare would unlock a ton of new value in this country targeted intelligently after the people who control 85% of spending. It’s the elephant in the room.”Amen @Tereza couldn’t have said this any better if I had tried all day! One day, my start-up *will* provide childcare grants to my employees. I am in precisely that position now (need a salary that will at least cover my childcare costs and can’t live off ramen and sleeping bags) and it’s been so hard for others to understand. Luckily, I don’t seek understanding, I just get stuff done and play by my own rules.

    2. JLM

      My children all called for “leche” before they called for milk.In the South, it is often a toss up as to who has actually raised our children. I have no problem with it and it is a warm and loving relationship but it is real nonetheless.

  3. ShanaC

    Super +1 for the gotham gal. She’s really opened up the book on how to do it all. (whatever it may be)Semi-off topic: Hey all you married people, how do you make the judgement before getting married that someone would work as a spouse, where you need them to support your dreams?(also, I’m having login problems in Canary, or I was on the gotham gal’s site? πŸ™ )

    1. Dave W Baldwin

      You share it.

      1. ShanaC

        Maybe I should take time off from dating. I’m finding the idea of trusting someone to share dreams with so oddly nightmarish. I keep thinking I’ll lose myself, and become Mrs. someone instead….

        1. Tereza

          Figure out your own dream. Then you’ll be in places where you’re more likely to meet guys who dream about the same stuff you do.

          1. ShanaC

            I’m closer to finding my dreams now – oddly I’m finding that I don’t want to be with someone who does something similar to what I do

        2. Dave W Baldwin

          You will find the power of random if you do a little more of the going out with friends. You’ll shake the pot somewhat if you are not looking for someone specific.No matter whom you meet up with and possibly marry, it is up to you regarding being Mrs. Someone or not.We’ll have a laugh not too far down the road.

    2. Tereza

      OK so I think it would be totally disingenuous to suggest that I know the keys to happy marriage and even saying it makes me cringe as I’d hate to jinx my own.But it’s been 10 years and not always easy but I have stood behind the choice of marrying my husband.He set himself apart in that he was very clear that he was interested — no ambiguity — and he seemed to think I walk on water. Go figure! Generally things were quite easy to do, plan, figure out together. I’d come off some relationships where everything felt like a negotiation or someone was sacrificing.So I’d say, plunk yourselves in a wide variety of situations and see how you fare. Heed the signals. If he gets cold feet, move on!Because, trust me, life is going to get way more complicated.A sterling character who adores you — that’s worth it’s weight in gold.

      1. ShanaC

        +1 on your last comment.Though I’ve always wanted to know- why do guys get cold feet? What is up with that (granted I also get cold feet, at least I tell people why though)

        1. Tereza

          Because they’re not ready.The only way for them to become ready is to leave them alone.They may decide they miss you and come back. Or not.Best thing is to move on, have your own little party wherever you go — and you will attract positive things.

          1. ShanaC

            boys= weird

  4. leigh

    I think what what most companies (be they start ups or not) also need are far more progressive policies within workplaces as well. I was very lucky that the first agency i worked at when I had my daughter allowed me to do the ‘race to the daycare’ at 5 and understood that I would go back online after she was inbed and work until i needed to to get whatever job done.Now that I’m the boss (and have had my second child 12 yrs later doh!), I have the same discussion with the people who want to come work for me (as often men as it is women) who are looking for progressive workplaces to call their home. I have never had someone’s children be an issue in their job performance and being flexible around that issue means I can get top talent who are looking for a company with a different attitude.

    1. Tereza

      I think you’re right, Leigh. There is awesome talent out there who’d love to work with and for people who ‘get it’.We recently needed a particular talent and so many people said ‘it’ll never happen, this market is too tight’.We put out a (narrow) call to a shortlist of excellent people, mostly parents.It worked out terrifically — we had tough choices to make because the candidates were awesome and they really liked what we stand for.It’s not rocket science. But it’s helpful to have experience such that you know how to make objectives clear, make the face-time that you have count, and allow lots of flex outside of that.

      1. leigh

        I have to say if i have any bias, it’s towards anyone who has had to work in high stress environments, are multi-taskers and can suck it up when they would rather smack someone due to rude behaviour. It’s great working experience which pretty much describes anyone who has worked in the service industry, and moms. πŸ™‚

  5. Dave W Baldwin

    Everyone enjoy making this day special. Message to Devs- design toward enabling the Moms to do more and you will make a difference.

  6. Aaron Klein

    My wife has always wanted to be a full time mom when we had kids, so that was our deal: I make enough so she can do that. I think it’s so important that we celebrate whatever choices women make, and I love my wife for how well she executes the “CEO of the household” role.I mean, think about it. On limited funding, she’s managed to get two products launched. It’s taken a few pivots to get them where they need to be, but they are scaling nicely. We expect an IPO around age eighteen, and both of them will be changing the world some day. :)Happy Mother’s Day to all you hard working moms out there. Men work twelve hour days and call that hard; you call it half the day off.

    1. Mark Essel


  7. Familytic

    Thanks for introducing interesting post and Gotham Gal, started to follow.

  8. daryn

    Shh… GG thinks the kids woke up on their own :)The multitasking abilities of moms truly are amazing, happy mother’s day to everyone.

  9. johnkoetsier

    Agree that women can (and do) manage incredible feats of multitasking.Totally disagree that kids are a ‘side project.’Wow.

    1. fredwilson

      everyone is reacting negatively to thatit was just an attempt at humor

  10. JLM

    There is a wisdom and wit that comes from bearing and rearing children. It is what keeps the species going. A convenient thing.I think the ability to recognize that fact and get it into the workplace and capitalize upon it is a transcendental skill and one that men often overlook.Women operate on a level of intuition that spreadsheets and financial ratios have beaten out of the average guy. We have lost the ability to be intuitive unless we go back and re-learn that skill. Women on the other hand can summon it up with a shallow breath.Plus they have the Holy Spirit on their side.Every bit of wickedness I ever engaged in as a child, my Mother immediately thwarted and attributed it to the intercession of the Holy Spirit. Mom and the Holy Spirit was a very tough team to best regardless of what your game skills were.My Mother was my greatest champion and never let me think for a second that I could not accomplish anything. I believed her.I miss my Mother.BTW, a ghoulish little fact. Regardless of what a tough guy one may think they are, you will be calling for your Mother at your moment of death, not your bookie, your tax accountant, your lawyer or your doctor. The circle of life.

    1. Tereza

      Your mother is the only person who is wires to love you unconditionally.Losing your mother launches you into a totally different life phase, no matter what age you are.No one loves you unconditionally anymore. You’re truly on your own.

      1. Mark Essel

        While it’s not much JLM’s got us, even if it’s only a few moments a few times a week. I can no longer count the number of smiles and somber thoughts his comments have instilled in, great meeting up if only for a moment. Happy mother’s day!

        1. fredwilson

          He’s a big part of why I hang out here!

  11. Dad


  12. Jennipher Marie

    As a mom and recent entrepreneur I can tell you it wouldn’t be possible with the support of my amazing husband. I love being a mom but love my work as well and having that suppot is very important.Happy mothers day to all the amazing moms and women.

    1. Tereza

      Ain’t that the truth. I am so very lucky for my husband as well.

  13. Steve Hallock

    I think it’s very important for women to be truly committed to their work and the idea of working before they have kids. If they aren’t doing something they love and/or are wavering at all on whether they want to continue working, it is probably difficult to get back.My wife is an artist who undertakes huge projects and values her work as perhaps the most important thing in her life. We now have a 4 month old at home and even she has been surprised at how strong the draw to stay home with the baby is. If she were not 100% committed to and in love with her work, it would be very difficult. On the other hand, because she is so committed, like many entrepreneurs are, I think her work will end up being even better for it.Any of us who have watched our wives through pregnancy, childbirth, and mothering, know how amazing they can be when they set their mind to something! Now off to brunch…

    1. Tereza

      Steve you sound like a terrific husband and dad.What you describe in your wife echoes my own experience and also that of most of my girlfriends who did continue to work: they really loved what they were doing, and actually felt they were not ‘done’ yet, professionally.I know for me, I so love all the things I do, including mothering. And I’m good at them and wouldn’t be my whole self if either piece were missing.

  14. Peter Sullivan

    I’m having a hard enough time starting a business with a girlfriend!

  15. matthughes

    Of the many lessons my mother taught me, two stand out to me today:Figure out exactly what you want and go get it.Kill people with kindness.I try to think about those lessons in my business dealings every day.Happy Mother’s Day to all the hard working mom’s.

    1. fredwilson

      big fan of “kill people with kindness”i try very hard to do that every day

    2. Tereza

      Smart mom. Mine used to say the same thing.

  16. Donna Brewington White

    I wouldn’t say that motherhood is not a hurdle to being an entrepreneur (or working, period) — but if you are willing to live with inordinate challenge, sleep deprivation, exhaustion, and a life of sacrifice, then it is a hurdle that can be overcome.But being an entrepreneur OR a mother would still involve all the above anyway!I have never really had the choice of whether or not to work, but wouldn’t have it any other way. I am not happy unless overcoming obstacles. It’s how I’m wired. (Or some would say how I’m weird.)A decade or so ago, when I returned to executive search/recruiting to start my own practice after a five-year hiatus from the business world in which I worked in a nonprofit setting, I was pregnant with my third child and raising two toddlers — and teaching myself to run a business and to do my work in a whole new way with the advent of the internet. I am now convinced that I can do practically anything.Personally, I am blessed with a husband who actually enjoys housework and who is a fantastic, highly involved Dad and this has made a huge difference I am sure.In fact, my husband was a “house husband” for a while and loved it — except for the strange stares from moms on the playground.I also got strange stares when I brought my laptop to the hospital for the births of #3 and #4.Additional thoughts:One of the reasons I passionately love the internet is that it has revolutionized the possibilities for women like me.I have to think that “side project” is being used tongue-in-cheek although we may need men to think this way. The lifelong aspect is spot on.My clients have never known that they were not my highest priority.——————————-Happy Mother’s Day everyone!Now I’m off to spend Mother’s Day afternoon at my 10 y.o. son’s flag football game. Watch for him in the NFL — he’s amazing!

    1. fredwilson

      happy mothers day donnayes, the side project thing was tongue in cheek

      1. Donna Brewington White

        Thanks, Fred. Meant to thank you for this post, too. Your understanding and continued support of women who want to make a difference in the marketplace — especially the entrepreneurial world — is much appreciated.

    2. Mark Essel

      Happy Mother’s Day Donna!

      1. Donna Brewington White

        :-)Thanks, Mark.

    3. Dave Pinsen

      Happy Mother’s Day, Donna. I remember you writing about a son, but I didn’t realize you had four kids. They must keep you busy.

  17. @shleyMetz

    It’s awesome that Gotham Gal has been able to raise kids, manage a household and do amazing work, which were all things she wanted to do. Still, I hope that women and men remember that women don’t have to maintain two jobs (in the home and outside of it) if they want to have kids. There is still this idea that women should be supported, but that the burden is not equal. Maybe that’s because it is still rare to have women in high management positions. Both men and women today aren’t used to the idea that the woman’s job could be “more important” and how that might affect their care taking roles.This will change. People often talk about how there aren’t enough women in technology, but the reasons are plenty and temporary – education and awareness, societal expectations, positive role models…Also, in response to one of the comments – endless work with spreadsheets and financial ratios can beat a lot of things out of a person, male or female. Intelligent and humble people, male or female, remain intuitive and humane regardless.Happy Mothers Day to the mothers who take on 2 jobs and the ones who choose one or the other to focus on.

  18. Neil Braithwaite

    Motherhood? A “side project?” Really?It sounds like motherhood is a lot more than a “side project” to your wife.And I’d bet she would give away all her “work” for any of her children if a choice had to be made.

    1. fredwilson

      that was a turn of phrase, artistic license

      1. Neil Braithwaite

        I assumed.I have to be very careful when I turn those kind of phrases around my wife, (Thirty years this month) otherwise my license may get revoked.Happy Mother’s Day to GG.

  19. abolish

    So here are some of the tasks you mention are part of “motherhood” and thank your wife for handling gracefully:* driving the kids here and there* dinner on the table* made sure the kids had what they needed* made sure our home was functioningVery simple question: Why do you assume men are not responsible for these tasks?Sorry to get all old-school feminist on you but jesus, it’s astounding how many seemingly intelligent people just ASSUME this is women’s work.

    1. Dave Pinsen

      Well, now that significantly more men are unemployed than women — the unemployment rate for men 20 years old and over is 10%, versus 7.7% for women (anyone want to “#changetheratio” there?) — you’ll probably see a lot more men take on those child-rearing tasks (unless their wives divorce them, that is).

      1. abolish

        But Fred wasn’t assuming women do this work because they’re unemployed. He’s assuming even employed female entrepreneurs should do this work because it’s part of “motherhood”.

        1. fredwilson

          it’s part of parenthoodwe share the work in our familymy wife cooks, i cleanshe drives, i do the billsetc, etc

          1. abolish

            That’s great, but somehow I still get the impression that the bulk of the parenting work falls on her shoulders, as it does in many households.Gotham Gal referred to her role as “CEO of the household”. She said that at one point 70% of her time was taken with family stuff and that she’s since figured out a way to reduce it — it being her responsibility as a mother and all. There’s a strong undercurrent of “the kids are mainly my job” and that is reflected here in thanking / being in awe of how women can handle both their profession and motherhood, an amazing challenge.The assumption is that men have a lighter workload than moms when it comes to parenting. Am I wrong?

          2. fredwilson

            no debate here on that

          3. Tereza

            My husband does at least 50% of the household stuff. Probably much more. I’m a heavier on kids, he’s a heavier on house and cooking.He has a full-time job. You have no idea the eye-rolls he gets from both non-parents as well as his boss (whose wife handled everything) when he leaves at 6 to get home….or says “I have a parent-teacher conference that day”.I just want to call this out because these guys are operating in a world of countervailing pressures.

          4. Tereza

            Also we need to know that expectations of parental involvement during the school day is way different from say 20 years ago.My daughter goes to the same elementary school I went to in the 70’s. My parents, who were hands-on immigrants, never set foot in the building and no parents did. Today, there’s not a day without expectations of parent volunteering and participation. This certainly is no Three Martini Playdate or Ice Storm Key Party.If you did everything the school wants you to do as a parent, across one or several children, you’d be in constant motion and double/triple-booked. Dads have no choice but to pitch in.

          5. Dave Pinsen

            Tereza,”You have no idea the eye-rolls he gets from both non-parents as well as his boss (whose wife handled everything) when he leaves at 6 to get home….or says “I have a parent-teacher conference that day”.”There’s a bigger issue there, and it’s not limited to parents. Lack of job security and high unemployment compels those who do have jobs to work longer and longer hours (when, presumably, they wouldn’t have to work so many hours if their employers hired more staff). My girlfriend had to be at her office in Midtown at 7am Friday for some issue, and didn’t get back until after 7pm that evening. She literally hasn’t been able to take one day off yet this year since they are so short-staffed.

        2. Dave Pinsen

          Why do you put motherhood in scare quotes as if it’s some sexist delusion that mothers have a natural role in caring for their kids?Fred didn’t say that women “should” do that work; he noted that they often happen to be the ones who do that work.In the past, men usually worked as primary breadwinners and women usually stayed home and handled the bulk of the child-rearing and homemaking work. Feminists chafed at that arrangement and wanted the opportunity to be primary breadwinners too. Thanks in part to their hard-won success, now most women can’t afford not to work outside the home, whether they have kids or not.Among affluent couples that can afford to have just one parent work, they often decide to have the one who can make more money outside the home do that, and the other one to take on primary responsibility for homemaking and child-rearing. I’m not sure what’s so objectionable about that.

          1. Tereza

            Hey Dave, one thing I’d say is that, in practice, most affluent couples I know are a well-educated pair. Sometimes she was earning as much or more as he was before.And yes I think focusing on motherhood is a natural and wonderful thing.But it also winds down and the kids leave the nest. Even just having the kids go from at-home to at school frees up a ton of time. Also, unfortunately, half marriages end in divorce.So if she can afford it and her marriage is stable, the typical path is ramp-up into full-time philanthropy/voluntarism. Or she gets a new degree.The vast majority of married women I know in my affluent town work on at least projects. Either to keep their brains busy, or as likely, to be saving for college, which we all know has become inordinately expensive. Or if she’s no longer married (very common), she needs it to live.

      2. Tereza

        Men today have it tough on many fronts.You’re supposed to be tough, and breadwinners…and emotionally available, and flexible career-wise, and cook and clean and everything. My own dad certainly wasn’t all those things…and in fact he struggled with the first two.By and large I have to say in my community the dads are working their asses off to be all those things. Weekends are a mashup of kids stuff and there’s social pressure from the kids and other parents for dad to be present.So this Mother’s Day, I don’t want to take anything away from our great dads. Just saving ’em for Father’s Day. :-)BTW — Dave, have you heard of Fantastic online pub and organization. We have a rel’p with then through Honestly Now. They’re about creating positive role models for young men to counteract the prevailing Jersey Shore lunkheads in the media….and they support at-risk young men.At HonestlyNow we like to say that we’re for women…and men who love them. And we think Good Men Project and others like them rock.

        1. Dave Pinsen

          Just an anecdote to add to the stats: I got an e-mail from a friend of mine this weekend, who has her own PR business. She has two kids and her husband’s out of work as well as her brother.I hadn’t heard of TheGoodMenProject, but I will check it out. Thanks for the tip.By the way, related to this discussion about unemployment, Seeking Alpha published an article by me today, “How not to fix America’s broken jobs machine”.

          1. Tereza

            It’s very difficult both economically and emotionally for a man to be out of work. It’s a bizarre paradox that women’s wage discount in the workforce was probably their saving grace in this last downturn.Gender issues aside, there is tremendous agism in the market. The new jobs are “young”. Very tough to be over 40 right now looking for work. Two advantages that women have are they’re (1) cheaper, and (2) they’re (for better or worse) perceived by employers as more flexible.I see lots more people “consulting”. Which is good when it’s good but when a project ends and there’s no pipeline it’s deadly. And of course no health insurance. This will be an issue for a long time and in fact I don’t think it will get better.The Baby Boom is starting to retire, age, get sick. Gen X-ers are caring for aging parents while raising young kids and holding a job. It’s a fucking grind. The one thing that I’m thankful for is that it’s behind me and not ahead of me. Some people will make lots of money off this. I’m surprised no one’s talking about this much in the web tech world, as it’s very obvious. I think they avoid it because other stuff is more fun.

          2. Dave Pinsen

            Re the gender gap, there has been research (e.g., by Thomas Sowell) showing there really isn’t one when you compare the same positions & qualifications and account for hours worked. But with so many more men than women out of work, my guess is that most women with jobs are working more these days.Definitely tougher to find work when you’re older in many fields.Re taking care of retiring baby boomers, there is a potential technology angle there. I mentioned an example in that Seeking Alpha article I linked to above: in Japan, they’ve invented machines that can bathe wheelchair-bound elderly. Tech like that can let older people live independently, with dignity, longer. Why there’s not much talk about it in the web tech world, is probably for two reasons:1) People do what they know, and what lots of well-off, urban, young people know best is using social media, going out to bars, restaurants, etc. Hence, businesses related to that.2) Cheap (primarily immigrant) labor. Japan generally eschews immigration, so it often substitutes tech for cheap labor (as in the example of those machines bathing the elderly, or other machines they have that bathe pets). That leads to more manufacturing jobs making those automated bathing machines, etc.

      3. ShanaC

        Actually I would….it is always an interesting discussion with certain guy friends when it turns out that long term I am likely to out earn them. Makes for a harder relationship in certain ways

      4. Mark Essel

        Couldn’t suppress a snicker at changing the ratio. You sir crack me up.

        1. Donna Brewington White

          @daveinhackensack:disqus cracks me up too.But he also makes me think. I like that.

          1. Dave Pinsen

            Thanks Donna. By the way, I learned about your use of Disqus’s new notify feature.Now if only they’ll fix the glitch that doesn’t let me see what I’m typing beyond a few lines…

    2. fredwilson

      i don’t assume it is women’s work but my wife does all of the cooking and almost all of the driving in our family. i can’t cook and i can barely drive.

      1. Tereza

        He can’t dress himself, either.That’s Gotham Garanimals at work.:-)

        1. fredwilson

          i can dress myselfjust not well πŸ™‚

      2. BB

        HAH. I love learning this about you, Fred. Charles is totally Miss Daisy in our (rental) car.

        1. fredwilson

          ADD is an asset in many parts of life but not behind the wheel of a car

      3. GlennKelman

        No one can comment insightfully on what happens in the privacy of one person’s family but in general many folks learn to be helpless. Fred, I must be one of your biggest fans, but submit humbly and respectfully that if you had to cook and drive, you could. There’s another way to make it work.

        1. fredwilson


  20. Todd_Andelin

    Story.A little boy is growing up and wants to play in the NFL ….his dad spends countless hours doing drills, watching film and games with him, etc.etc.etc. pumping him up to play pro ball. “Your gonna be there someday son”One day the kid grows up and does play in the NFL. Catches the game winning touchdown….after the game a camera focuses on him and the only thing he says is:”I love you Mom!”…….he knows who really got him to the NFL!

    1. fredwilson

      saw that all day yesterday on the pre and post game shows for the NBAplayoffsit was a great mothers day for the NBA

  21. Rupert

    One research area that is changing fast is the study of the development of babies neural pathways (babies are not born with fully developed brains, unlike eyes or ears). Lo and behold it is turning out that a key ingredient for healthy brain development is a high level of responsive Affection. This is needed all day everyday in little infants. So the tact that a mom has to go back to work one week may be a sign of tenacity and grit. But It is a sacrifice as in reality day care staff are neither able( due to cared: infant ratios) nor motivated to supply that level to provide that level of intimate affection and Alwyas On loving. Our little ones need fierce loving and ruthless prioritizing to grow healthy minds and hearts- the kind only a parent / close primary cared can give. They are the ultimate start up. Happy Mothers Day, especially to those with fewer choices and less support.

  22. Rupert

    One research area that is changing fast is the study of the development of babies neural pathways (babies are not born with fully developed brains, unlike eyes or ears). Lo and behold it is turning out that a key ingredient for healthy brain development is a high level of responsive Affection from their primary carer / parent.This is needed all day everyday in little infants. So the fact that a mom has to go back to work one week after birth may be a sign of tenacity and grit. But It is a sacrifice as in reality day care staff are neither able( due to cared: infant ratios) nor motivated to supply that level to provide that level of intimate affection and Alwyas On loving. Our little ones need fierce loving and ruthless prioritizing to grow healthy minds and hearts- the kind only a parent / close primary cared can give. It cant be outsourced to day care staff in the same way key business strategy cant be outsourced and a start up stay healthy Kids, as everyone has noted are the ultimate start up. Happy Mothers Day, especially to those with fewer choices and less support.

  23. Laura Yecies

    I believe I am a better entrepreneur and particularly a better people manager because of my experience as a mother. Since I had my first child in graduate school I’ve been a working mom my entire professional life. It wouldn’t be possible if my husband (who is also an entrepreneur) didn’t share the job of being a parent and managing the household. I believe my husband and I as well as our children have thrived on this combination.While this approach has worked for me I know there are many women who want to take a break (or lower key path for several years) then reenter when the kids are older. Unfortunately the data from economists (e.g. Myra Strober at Stanford and others) show that these women pay a long term economic penalty and unfortunately our society potentially looses out when they can’t renter. I am hopeful that the entrepreneurial path may be a more flexible and economically attractive one for these women.

  24. BuyGiftsItems

    In fact, my husband was a “house husband” for a while and loved – except the odd looks from moms in the playground.Kamagra

  25. Diane Dolinsky-Pickar

    I loved this post because it showed me my mistakes from the past. That is, for many years I said (to myself, and out loud as well) that my husband, who was the major breadwinner, could not be counted on Monday thru Friday, to do household and kid stuff. And do you know what? I failed at several jobs, when I couldnt keep the balls in the air, when serious illness hit my third child, and later, befell my second child. Well, after several years of that, I got over that blindness, and now, I insist that he back me up as I back him up. It makes the arrangement much fairer, and in fact, allows me to be a person sometime, and not just a devote Mom. And, I think it humanizes us both and sets a better example for the kids.

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  27. New mommy

    Β Nice post! Its good to see there are husbands who support this view… I’d love my husband to think this way… For me its work and baby with no help from him πŸ™