Minimum Viable Personality

Today we have a special guest post. There have been a few guest posts here at AVC. Maybe a half dozen in total. One of my favorites was this one by JLM during the financial crisis of 2008/2009. But this one today may top that gem.

It's from our favorite Giant Robot Dinosaur and it's about Minimal Viable Personality, something I have referred to as "voice" in pior posts. The Grimster is so right that this is critical to building a successful product.

One final note. If you want to tweet out one or more of the many awesome quotes in here, please add the hashtag #grimlockquotes. I'd like to watch them come in. Because you know they will.

————

MINIMUM VIABLE PERSONALITY 

MOST IMPORTANT STEP FOR BUILD PRODUCT IS BUILD PRODUCT. 

SECOND MOST IMPORTANT IS BUILD PERSONALITY FOR PRODUCT. 

NO HAVE PERSONALITY? PRODUCT BORING, NO ONE WANT. 

BREADORBACON

 

PERSONALITY BETTER THAN MARKETING 

WHEN CHOOSE PRODUCT, HUMANS ONLY CARE ABOUT DOES WORK, AND IS INTERESTING. 

WORLD ALREADY FULL OF THINGS DO WORK. MOST BORING. 

PERSONALITY = INTERESTING. INTERESTING = CARE. CARE = TALK.  

EVERYONE CARE AND TALK ABOUT PRODUCT? YOU WIN. 

CAREPLUSTALKISWIN

SELL TO FRIENDS, NOT STRANGERS 

PERSONALITY MAKE PRODUCT FRIEND. YOU HELP FRIEND. YOU FORGIVE WHEN FRIEND NOT PERFECT. YOU WANT FRIEND WIN. 

BORING STRANGER?… YOU NOT. 

PERSONALITY IS API FOR LOYALTY. NO ONE CARE WHICH BORING STRANGER IS NEXT. BUT ALWAYS WANT FRIEND NEXT. 

LOYALTYPORT

PERSONALITY MAKE MEANING 

CAN PET ROCK. PET DOG BETTER. PET DOG HAVE MEANING. 

BORING PRODUCT IS ROCK. NO HAVE MEANING. INTERACT WITH PERSONALITY DIFFERENT. HAVE MEANING. 

INTERESTING PRODUCT THAT GIVE FRIENDS MEANING = MOST WIN OF ALL. 

NOTAROCK

HOW NOT BE BORING 

HAVE PERSONALITY EASY. ANSWER THREE QUESTIONS: 

1. HOW YOU CHANGE CUSTOMER'S LIFE?  

2. WHAT YOU STAND FOR? 

3. WHO OR WHAT YOU HATE? 

NOW HAVE MISSION, VALUES, ENEMY. THAT ENOUGH FOR MINIMUM VIABLE PERSONALITY. 

KEEP IN BRAIN WHEN WRITE, TALK, BLOG, TWEET. ITERATE. IMPROVE WHAT WORK. DELETE WHAT NOT. PERSONALITY GROW. 

NO BE CHICKEN 

CHICKEN LIVE IN CAGE. NO CAN HAVE PERSONALITY INSIDE CAGE.  

LAST STEP IS SMASH CAGE, LIGHT BARN ON FIRE. 

DO THAT, YOU WIN.

  CHICKENWIN

#Web/Tech

Comments (Archived):

  1. Ciaran

    Brilliant.I’ve seen the same thoughts expressed in many ways (be different or be commoditised, entertain me or **** off being two that spring to mind), but this is one that I will cherish. Seriously.

  2. David Noël

    “PERSONALITY IS API FOR LOYALTY” — love it!

    1. kirklove

      That was the exact line I was going to quote. DAMN GERMANY AHEAD IN TIME 😉

      1. David Noël

        EUROPE, BABY! PREMIUM TERRITORY. 

        1. Kathryn Fink

          THERE BE NO CHICKENS IN EUROPE

          1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            @twitter-137841034:disqus EUROPE NEED MORE DANGEROUS CHICKEN.

        2. Tomás Senart

          I am imagining a certain Parker saying that.

      2. John Britton

        EUROPE IS FUTURE

        1. fredwilson

          hi Johni was talking about you a lot this week. jeff lawson was in town and we were talking about developer evangelism

        2. Carl Rahn Griffith

          Europe. Does that include the UK, John? ;-)Regardless, I’m OK. I am based in Yorkshire… 🙂

        3. Danielle Morrill

          So excited to come live in the future for awhile then!

        4. martin_english

          Like so 10 hours ago, man….It’s tomorrow in Australia, for at least half of Europe’s day. As for Americans…. they’re so yesterday’s news 🙂

      3. Interested

        What does “API” stand for?

        1. Nick

          There’s this wondrous new technology they call a “search engine”. You’ve probably never heard of it since it’s only been around a decade and a half, but it lets you type things in and it will find them for you. Why, perchance you might venture to give it a whirl yourself and cure yourself of your intellectual laziness.

          1. Alex Murphy

            Well Nick, API stands for several things.  I could come up with a few choice ones since you didn’t answer the original question that might be applicable to your response.  When you google API, the first response is the American Petroleum Institute.  Or the third which is Academic Programs International.  For me, Google then adds in three choices for me locally.In the end, this post was referencing an Application Programming Interface.Perhaps rather than writing a snippy comment you could just answer the question.  Two rules of thumb, be nice and treat others the way you want to be treated.

          2. Nick

            The first for me when I type “API” into Google is the Wikipedia article Application Programming Interface.  However, search results differ by country and user so it might involve a bit of thought to be able to work it out.  “Personality is American Petroleum Institute for loyalty” … hm… might have to reject that one.

    2. Interested

      What does “API” stand for?

      1. David Noël

        Application programming interface – it lets software programs communicate with each other

        1. kirklove

          Or in this case Authentic Person Interface 😉

          1. JamesHRH

            Really good Kirk! Like it.

          2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            YES.

        2. Interested

          THank you!

    3. Cassio

      Genial mesmo.

  3. maverickny

    Teh awesome! I am going to print this one out and stick it on my office wall.

  4. Manshu

    This is brilliant!!!

  5. Ruth Benjamin-Thomas

    Grim really is special. I do so love the simplicity. I’m with you Fred, this is my favourite guest post by far!

    1. fredwilson

      how can it not be?giant robot dinosaurs don’t post about product strategy very often

      1. Carl Rahn Griffith

        Who needs a Purple Cow when we’ve got a Robot Dinosaur?!Only kidding, Mr SG! 😉

  6. RichardF

    There are more gems in this post than in Harry Winston’s.”CHICKEN LIVE IN CAGE”  – brilliantYou really are on a different planet Grimlock

    1. fredwilson

      i didn’t even read it before i posted iti knew it would be a gem

      1. RichardF

        the twitter is going to be alive with grimlock quotes in caps today.Already seen Fred Destin tweet.

        1. fredwilson

          we need a hashtagi’m going to edit the post to add one

          1. RichardF

            hashtag should be in CAPS 🙂 

      2. Tereza

        Hmmm a guest post by Fake Grimlock. Wonder who thought of that? He must be brilliant!

      3. matthughes

        knowing that makes it even better

      4. JamesHRH

        high praise.

    2. Carl Rahn Griffith

      I especially love the chicken/cage/freedom analogy. When discussing corporate life vs independent entrepreneur/start-up life, a good Twitter friend of mine, @littlelaura, summed up the difference perfectly, ages ago – “I choose to be free-range” … :-)Nice job, FG – and well done, Fred, for opening-up your platform in such a way – so many business snobs would be dismissive of some of the people/style of thinking/expression on here – however, those of us here are fortunate enough to understand that the A VC MBA is a beautiful thing!

      1. RichardF

        A beautiful thing indeed Carl.I can’t remember how I stumbled onto AVC (a search on term sheets I think) anyway however it was, it was pure serendipity

        1. Donna Brewington White

          It would be interesting to find out how different ones of us landed here.  It’s pretty obvious why we stayed.

      2. fredwilson

        this is an example of how we try to run our firm. we try super hard to be open to everyone and give them a hearing. we certainly fail at that every day. we have a supply demand problem of extreme proportions. but by trying hard to be open to everyone, we do get to meet people that are special but also outliers

        1. Carl Rahn Griffith

          The ‘Funky Business’ approach. Love it.

        2. samharrison

          if only you really did run it that way fred…if only. As an entreprenuer I’d much rather take an investment from grimlock than union square ventures…why? he understands the coop and how most vc are chicken shit

          1. fredwilson

            do you have a specific complaint? i’d like to hear it.as i said in my comment, we fail at being open every day. but we certainly try hard to be open

          2. fredwilson

            do you have a specific complaint? i’d like to hear it.as i said in my comment, we fail at being open every day. but we certainly try hard to be open

          3. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            SOON AS GRIMLOCK HAVE GIANT PILE OF MONEY, US TALK.UNTIL THEN, HAVE… *LOOKS* THREE DOLLARS, 45 CENTS?THAT ENOUGH FOR BOOTSTRAP 3 STARTUPS!

          4. JamesHRH

            Chickenshit? Even a cursory review of USV’s track record undermines your statement.You are absolutely right that 96% of funding sources are sheep – they like to be with the herd.Any analysis of VC returns indicates that the top tier – the ones with guts, smarts & insight – crush their returns.And that the sheep get slaughtered.Check USV’s returns lately?Get your facts straight before you run your mouth.

          5. Alex Murphy

            nice, @fredwilson:disqus  got back.@samharrison:disqus , don’t take a knife to a gun fight.

        3. Donna Brewington White

          “We do get to meet people that are special but also outliers”  Just saw the book “Outliers” in the airport news stand — looks interesting — have you read this?Made me wonder about implications for entrepreneurs.

          1. Carl J. Mistlebauer

            Grab the book and read it..its great! I read it a few months ago!

    3. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME NOT ON DIFFERENT PLANET! ME CAN TELL. DIFFERENT PLANET NOT HAVE STARBUCKS.

      1. William Mougayar

        LOL. I READ YOU DRINK LOADS OF COFFEE. IS THAT TRUE? MAYBE IS SOURCE OF YOUR WISDOM?

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          COFFEE SOURCE OF STAY AWAKE.WISDOM HARD TO GIVE WHEN SLEEPING.

          1. William Mougayar

            Just make sure you sleep enough hours in-between coffees.SLEEPING RECHARGE GRIMLOCK’S BATTERIES.

      2. RichardF

        Well I know Howard Schultz is always looking for new territories to conquer

  7. markslater

    asking these questions of the team this morning. nice one dino.

  8. Cam MacRae

    Minimum Viable Personality doesn’t come close to doing this post justice. How about Free Range Chicken Theory?Seriously though, if you could mint giant robot dinosaurs we wouldn’t be in this mess.

    1. Carl Rahn Griffith

      Ditto, ‘free range chicken theory’ as per my post in this thread, lol.

    2. JamesHRH

      CHANGE POST. GET EATEN

  9. mcenedella

    This is quite amusing, and, yes, perhaps the best guest post ever!Personality works.  When I launched TheLadders, there were 30,000 “job boards” competing for attention and we had a different model — charging the job-seeker.So I figured a voice, not a boring “CorpSpeak” would be the best way to get our message across.  From the very beginning, I’ve written a weekly newsletter to our subscribers — only 3 subscribers for that first newsletter back in August 2003, now almost 5 million and the largest jobs advice newsletter in the world.A very important, and a very interesting point, is that what you hate is as important as what you love.  In order to be FOR something, you need to be AGAINST something.In HR circles, I’m perhaps most infamous for this newsletter from 2007:”Man, I Hate American Airlines”: https://www.theladders.com/… that was the subject line that went out to our then 3 mm subscribers that Monday morning.I caught a lot of heat from the all the expected corners of the internet — American Airlines, people who are against other people having opinions, my own sales team — but we got the largest response we’d ever received to a newsletter.  And of the 1,887 responses from customers, 1,875 were positive.And that’s because we said something that everybody knows, and everybody wants to be against, and everybody is just waiting for somebody else to stick their neck out and say what’s really true.And that builds credibility, trust, and loyalty.Having a personality, in an age when that’s difficult, and unique, and special, is going to be the only way to compete when everybody else is just as smart, logical, and effective as you.

    1. fredwilson

      opinion matters

    2. felixc

      Agreed. I actually remember reading that email when it came out and it made a strong, distinct, and positive impression.I think there is an old Alan Kay quote that is relevant: “Point of view is worth 80 IQ points.”

      1. mcenedella

        Thanks Felix.  Of course, it’s a little bit unfair to pick on an airline — they’re too easy a target — but very glad you liked it!

    3. Mike

      Marc,I love that you responded to this because your example is the gold standard in having a voice and standing out in a crowded space.One question, how long did it take you to overcome the fear of being so public with your thoughts each week? Or does that come pretty natural?

      1. mcenedella

        Thanks Mike!Well, at first it wasn’t that public because I only had 3 subscribers!  It’s a little bit like the frog in boiling water, you don’t realize how large it is getting because you’re just typing into the same keyboard at the same desk every week.  And then a bunch of e-mails and blog comments come in — makes it seem real, but not in the same way that, say, speaking at Madison Square Garden would.Does that make sense?

    4. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME, GRIMLOCK, LIKE THELADDERS. HAVE GOOD BLOG, FULL OF SMART PEOPLE.

  10. Paula Ronan

    love it. setting barn on fire now. ouch.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      MAKE SURE LEAVE BARN BEFORE SET ON FIRE.OTHERWISE NOT WORK AS WELL.

      1. JamesHRH

        LOL

  11. Stephen Albright

    Great post. With my first startup, we developed a solid vision for the product’s personality, but didn’t utilize our friends nearly as well as we should have.  This certainly inhibited our growth.

  12. Christian Steiauf

    Great page, illustrations and important aspects – “no be chicken – no one can have personality inside cage” LOVE it 🙂

  13. Kasi Viswanathan Agilandam

    I really loved morphing “Customers” ==> “Friends”…Smashing. Smashing. Smashing.I still remember the day when i set the barn on fire… here are the exact words i told my  HR upon setting the barn on fire … “Who the Hell asked for your Relieving letter”

  14. Jere Majava

    THIS POST WIN.

    1. fredwilson

      yup

  15. Joe@Infinipool

    Thank you for this post and for me the timing is perfect. This just hits the spot head on and being in a start-up trying to gain some traction in the market quite motivational and moving.This has to be probably one of the all time best Blog posts I have seen. 

  16. Steve

    Love it…  so simple, so great…

  17. Kasi Viswanathan Agilandam

    This is not good.This is not brilliant.This is not awesome.This is …This is Smashing.This is Squashing.This is Sweeping.This is Dunking through the throat.

  18. Jan Schultink

    KEITH HARING, GAPINGVOID WATCH OUT: NEW CARTOON ART GENIUS TAKING OVER WORLD BY STORM

    1. fredwilson

      the chicken and the barn may go on my office wall at workso damn good

        1. MarkUry

          Thanks Mark. Very kind.

        2. Adrian Palacios

          thank you so much mark!

        3. Jan Schultink

          What software did you use for this?

        4. Julian A Waters

          Thanks, that might be the closing slide for my investor pitch. WONT BE EATEN!

        5. samwyse

          I’m going to print out the chicken, and give it to my kids to color. Might as well get them on the right path early!

        6. fredwilson

          thanks marki’m going to try to get a limited edition print signed by the grimster

          1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            IT ADDED TO BACKLOG.

          2. JamesHRH

            IT GO TO TOP OF PILE!

      1. NICCAI

        READ BRILLIANT. DRAW AWESOME. DO WIN.

      2. Alex Murphy

        you should do a fund raiser and sell them off as original art worksignature of the grimlock and FW

      3. Mark Essel

        That’s my quote for the post. Strong personal meaning.

  19. William Mougayar

    Great pearls of wisdom. All very true. The essence of what you’re saying is to be Authentic and be Original, and that’s applied across people relationships, products and lifestyle. That’s the “anti-boring” medication, according to @fakegrimlock:twitter  (you said Boring 7 times in that post). ——————————————————————————-SORRY FOR TYPOS CAUSE I REPLY TO GRIMLOCK

  20. Ahartman

    Burned the barn, killed the fox, smashed the coop, damn I’m not eating that chicken either.

  21. FAKE GRIMLOCK

    ‘<

    1. Rohan

      well done grimster. 🙂 As usual!

  22. leelayz

    Dear Fred, It’s good to read this post. Actually, there has been academic research done on the same (not sure if AVC readers will be interested, but I will share nonetheless). I read a book on reputation management by Prof Gary Davis during my time at Manchester Business School. http://www.mbs.ac.uk/resear…According to Gary’s research on managing reputation – Managing Reputation = Living Values Internally and Promoting them Externally   This begs two different questions – 1. Who we are (internal) ? – This is more about how the employees view the organisation.2. How we are seen (external) ? – This is more about how customers view the organisation. Gary’s research was conducted by gathering extensive primary data (interviews), across industries. According to the research, Gary found extensive correlation between the employee view and the customer view. For example, in a food retail chain, it was found that employee satisfaction translates into customer satisfaction. There were many other aspects that were studies like age of employees,  informality, ect.However, what might be interesting to the discussion here is how Gary categorized the corporate character. These were – 1. Agreeableness(Cheerful, Open, ect) –  Ex – Telephone Companies2. Enterprise(Cool, trendy,ect) – Ex – Tech Companies3. Competence – Ex: Banks4. Chic – Ex: Zara5. Ruthlessness – Ex : EasyJet6. Machismo – Ex: Harley Davidson7. Informality – Ex: DebenhamsI think it might be good to understand how you might want people to perceive your company and thinking about these character types might help in associating a certain personality to your company. CheersSuva

    1. Kasi Viswanathan Agilandam

      Interesting  … Ex:Gary.why do you want to spell eg as ex … it sounds like they existed not anymore.

    2. JamesHRH

      folks – GRIM has merely laid out Brand Theory dino-speak.There is lots of thought on this topic out there – its just that tech folks don’t go outside tech folks to learn.So they need a giant robot dinosaur from the future to light their barn on fire.

  23. kirklove

    Super. Super. Super.WELL DONE GRIMLOCK.

  24. chartreuse

    Wow. That was like hearing a very good song for the very first time. Brilliant. I keep reading it over and over again. .

    1. fredwilson

      all the oldies but goodies are coming out for this onechartreuse is in the house todayit’s a bog day at AVC

      1. karen_e

        Yes, indeed, it’s a great day at AVC.

        1. RichardF

          ++1

  25. Phil Riordan

    Reazd AVC every day and have never commented Grimlocks brilliance makes it impossible not to, have heard MVP being used as Minimum Value Proposition, Product and many others but Personality is the best one I have heard yet… PERSONALITY MAKE PRODUCT FRIEND. YOU HELP FRIEND. YOU FORGIVE WHEN FRIEND NOT PERFECT. YOU WANT FRIEND WIN.  – love it!!

    1. fredwilson

      welcome Phil. i hope this is not your last comment

  26. Orhan1642

    Super.WELL DONE GRIMLOCK

  27. awaldstein

    Grimlock is the ‘MVP’ of the day.Makes me think of the line from Bill Clinton about partnerships between countries: “That to have friends you need to be a friend.”Translated to Grim Talk this is: YOU HELP FRIEND. YOU FORGIVE WHEN FRIEND NOT PERFECT. YOU WANT FRIEND WIN.

    1. Carl Rahn Griffith

      And (increasingly so), Facebook is becoming a rather suffocating matriarch whilst Twitter continues to be the funky nephew, who’s always welcome at parties…

      1. awaldstein

        Facebook is essential and part of life but there is certainly no love…

        1. JamesHRH

          Great post by Deirdre Breakenridge that lays out market view of Fb & Tumblr – http://bit.ly/r6rE4SKey quotes:Q: What do you like the most about Facebook?-       You get to talk to friendsQ: Would you stop interacting on one to spend all of your time on the other?- We don’t want to give up Facebook.- It’s necessary because it’s an easy way to find something out. We get homework from classmates and we don’t have to text a best friend to see what she’s doing.- Facebook has a connection purpose, but Tumblr is about me!- On Tumblr I can relate to others more than I can on Facebook.So, Fb=friends. Tumblr = self expression.Voice is important.But if your brand has 750M people in need, maybe not so much. Network effect anyone?

          1. awaldstein

            thnx for the link.

          2. fredwilson

            my favorite part of that tumblr/facebook post is where they said they wanted a hug from davidi didn’t see anyone asking for a hug from markand that’s exactly why tumblr is what it is. i’d like a hug from david too.

          3. JamesHRH

            Jim Breyer?

  28. William Gadea

    This made me think of when I was trying to choose between Mail Chimp and Constant Contact. It’s sort of a dreary service either way, so it shocked me that the Chimp had so much personality. The Constant Contact brand, on the other hand, was B2B boilerplate. I’m sure I considered price and offerings and all that, but the brands made me enter into the decision with a pronounced bias.And the other big plus for branding… I’m talking about it now!

    1. fredwilson

      that’s a great example

      1. William Gadea

        How about that contextual advertising… I’m now seeing a Constant Connect ad on the sidebar. Hee, hee.The most unconventional part of the post for me was that personality wasWHO OR WHAT YOU HATE?Yes, it’s true. It’s about love and hate. You have to unleash your hate too (in a witty, palatable way hopefully.)

        1. JamesHRH

          GRIM post somewhere about having to stand for something means hating something else is right out of The 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing (pub’d 1979). It is a brand manager’s bible – see Law #2 Focus.

          1. William Gadea

            Thanks, I’ll have to go back to my classics!

    2. tgodin

      What are some other examples from the community in which product personality truly makes a difference in the decision to use / not use?  Lots of agreement that the thesis is true, but few examples.

      1. Anne Libby

        Apple comes to mind…also proving that there’s got to be a “there there” — value trumps personality.  My dad, now in his late 70s, has used Apple one on one service over the years to get pointers on Garage Band, Photoshop, etc.  My conversion to Apple was cemented by watching how one of the young Geniuses worked with him.   A young guy who looked like a “Mac,” and my dad, who looked like neither PC nor Mac…(edited, found a typo on re-reading, aargh)

        1. William Gadea

          Sure, and to take it beyond the anecdote… because of the ‘halo effect’ Apple desktop and laptop marketshare started growing after the introduction of the iPod and iPhone. The offerings didn’t substantially change, but the brand had been bolstered.But yeah, Grimlock himself says it’s got to work first.

          1. JamesHRH

            William – this is a great example and it must be a Biz School case somewhere. By creating the iPod, Apple repositioned iMacs from ‘only for schools & design pros’ to ‘consumer media hub’.With that new Why buy a Mac position, they were able to pound away @ PCs with great ads. Why MS ever made Office for Mac is beyond me ( ‘drowning Steve, need a hand?’ ???????? ).Then it turned out that media was the Internet. Now Fred says SW is Media. He even owns Apple products, even though he is a ‘make it cost less guy’.They didn’t burnish the brand: they moved it down the shore from PC Bay ( where they were swimming against the tide ) to Internet Media Beach, where the tide is rising something fierce.Brilliant – and overlooked as far as I know – marketing.Glad I have holes in my day for this post!

          2. William Gadea

            Yes, and a position more suited to their inherent strengths: ease-of-use and software/hardware integration vs. price and wide choice of third-party software.

          3. JamesHRH

            @google-348bfb939ad9be473f71ec1835518c1a:disqus last post bang on – alignment is critical.Founder personality (quite often) = inherent strengthsGetting yourself aligned to your opportunity makes GRIMVP process feel like running downhill.

          4. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            ME LIKE “GRIMVP”.

      2. awaldstein

        @annelibby:disqus Apple is a good one.Aren’t we really talking about brand?My feeling towards LuLuLemon for urban gear, Armani for their black shirts, Porsche for their Turbo Whale Tail, the Jura as terroir for natural wines, MoMa, this blog?You get my point I’m sure. Each of us has their own.The importance of Grimlock’s post is that you need to discover this anew as we create new products and new brands.Non trivial. No roadmap. I don’t agree that it is more powerful than marketing. I think it is marketing!

        1. Anne Libby

          I think it’s beyond just brand.  The cable company has a brand, too!   It’s keeping the brand’s promise.   Brand integrity.

          1. awaldstein

            Maybe…to me they should be one and the same. Brand value of Apple for example, and brand disdain of the cable and telephone companies, let’s say, are both filters.But one makes me want to participate. One makes me want to keep away.See your point but when you are building something from the ground up, that personality ends up being the brand value and the community connection.So…think we are agreeing in concept at least.

          2. Anne Libby

            Yes, we do.  Apple, Lulu, et al are keeping the promises of their brands.   Cable and phone companies, not so much.And to your point about participation, perhaps the heart of the upset about changes at Netflix?  (And a challenge for Danny Meyer, as he grows his restaurants into markets he can’t be in every day.)

        2. JamesHRH

          Marketing = brand promise = offering = company execution = authentic company culture.If you are efficiency freak, totally bland cat, go with that ( see Dell, Michael & Bezos, Jeff ).If you are a better way to do things cat, go with that ( see Jobs, Steve ).If you are a tool maker, go with tools ( see Gates, Bill & Zuckerberg, Mark ). These cats are old school MVP types, not GRIMVP types!What you need is to balance your personality with the business areas that you naturally avoid, so that your company is healthier ( remember: tension holds things together ) than you are likely to be!

      3. leigh

        Toyota Matrix and Pontiac Vibe are the exact same car.Exact same factoryMade by the exact same peopleGuess which one sells more vehicles for more money and less incentives?(or at least did before Toyota screwed their brand up with their product issues 🙂

      4. anne weiler

        Hootsuite. Love those owls.

        1. tgodin

          Interesting.   What’s Hootsuite’s “personality”?   (I’m sincerely asking).

          1. invoker

            Badass disruptive owls!

          2. anne weiler

            Funny, I would have said “friendly, approachable, curious, intelligent”

  29. Tereza

    Love this post!  Way to go, Fake G!The extension of this is where to put the personality, and how much is too much. And personality is dynamic, not static. Treading that line is a constant challenge.  A platform needs to be super-simple, you have to pick your personality shots carefully. Too much sugar in your coffee is not a good thing.We’ve grappled with this for a while for Honestly Now. We re-launched web 2.0 last week and it’s chock full of my personality.  Since the inspiration for the product came from a deeply personal (and dark) place, it has been scary as shit to do that.  It has been as much an emotional journey as a product and business one. But it was the moment where I saw the personality come to life that I feel — OK people, get out of the way.  Now I truly believe that if everyone plays with Honestly Now to get to the bottom of their thorny life questions, the world will be measurably better, for ourselves and the people we affect.  I want one billion ‘honest moments’.Personality scavenger hunt: go into http://www.honestlynow.com and ask a salacious unresolved personal question, and see how we let you to ask it anonymously if you wish. #productshillLove me, love my product.

    1. Tereza

      I wrote about the emotional/personality part here:http://www.women2.org/found…Oh, cool, just noticed I’m an “Instigator”.  Now that’s a title that’ll get me to return to comment…  Cute personality in that.

      1. Donna Brewington White

        You have the “instigator badge” because you are an instigator.  Not the other way around…  😉

    2. awaldstein

      Good luck with this Tereza. It’s a delicate dance.When this works, it’s almost always the personality of the user and the community that shines back on the product or platform. But I get surprised often.Companies and people can lead. Users and communities are the defining personality through their behaviors.Gee…sounds like a definition of brand;)avc.com is a good case in point for this.

    3. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME, GRIMLOCK, SAY THANK YOU TO TEREZA!

      1. Tereza

        ME, TEREZA, LOVE FAKE G. KISSY KISSY!

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          HOLD ON. NEED GET LADDER FIRST.KISS ON KNEE NOT WORK AS WELL.

          1. Tereza

            Hahaha!

  30. Diesel Laws

    This post is filled with so much win. RESPECT OH MIGHTY GRIMLOCK!

  31. DavidSandrowitz

    So, who’s printing up t-shirts with that sinister chicken graphic?  I’d buy one today.

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        WILL MAKE TONIGHT.

        1. Carl Rahn Griffith

          Watch out, Gaping Void…We now have Snoopy’s wit and philosophy morphed with Godzilla’s gravitas and power… FG!

      1. EmilSt

        Just ordered one. This post rocks! Cheers man!

    1. fredwilson

      i want it on my wall in my office

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        THAT INTERESTING IDEA.SPECIAL LIMITED ART PRINT? ‘<

        1. JamesHRH

          How do you sign art?

          1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            WITH PEN.

        2. fredwilson

          yes. 10 copies or lessi get one (happy to pay for it)we sell the other nine on AVC!

        3. fredwilson

          yes. 10 copies or lessi get one (happy to pay for it)we sell the other nine on AVC!

  32. Alison

    It’s a sad reality that we love to hate in gangs.  I’d like to go deeper than group hate.  Much much deeper.  Group hate may unite people with my product, but I’d rather leave the hate and create such an amazing product that group hate wasn’t necessary to make it a winner.  Can you write a formula for success that doesn’t include uniting in hatred?

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      STAND FOR SOMETHING REQUIRE STAND AGAINST SOMETHING ELSE.HATE NOTHING IS STAND FOR NOTHING.

      1. timoteoverde

        do you think it has to be hatred in order to be effective?  or maybe this is an oversimplification?  

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          EVERYTHING TRUE IS SIMPLE.EVEN IF LIFE IS NOT.

          1. Carl J. Mistlebauer

            Life is actually quite simple, you are born, you live, and then you die. True life is truly simple.Emotions, thoughts, and egos are nothing more than excess lines of code in the program of life.

          2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            YES.

      2. Anne Libby

        How about love?  (or should I say, LOVE?)

        1. JamesHRH

          Stand against apathy.

          1. Anne Libby

            I’m in.

          2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            WITH WITHOUT AGAINST MEAN NOTHING.

      3. JamesHRH

        Basic brand positioning.And life lesson.

      4. mike gilfillan

        T-shirt REQUEST!!   On black T with white letters.

      5. aslevin

        Hate too much and turn into your enemy.

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          HATE TOO LITTLE, TURN INTO NOTHING.

    2. Luke Chamberlin

      Blandness, poor design, unintuitive features, lazy execution… it’s okay to hate some things.

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        HATE BAD IS GOOD.

        1. JamesHRH

          Love good is hate bad. Bad love is good hate. This could be a loop 😛

    3. JamesHRH

      Apple stand against PC.People who love Apple hate PCs.Fact of life – just focus on the love.

  33. William Mougayar

    GRIMLOCK, BUT I BEG TO DIFFER ON NOT SELLING TO STRANGERS. ALL FRIENDS BEGIN AS STRANGERS, NO? AND WHY STRANGERS BORING? THEY BECOME FUN AFTER BEING FRIENDS?

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      POINT IS TURN STRANGER INTO FRIEND. NO LEAVE THEM AS STRANGER.

      1. Carl Rahn Griffith

        To paraphrase an old saying, ‘You can choose your strangers, but not your friends” …

      2. William Mougayar

        Good point. Agreed. Thanks.

  34. Harry DeMott

    GIANT ROBOT DINOSAUR HAVE MASSIVE PERSONALITY!So many companies forget this.Great stuff

  35. Denim Smith

    Love it. And love that you’ve affectionately called him the Grimster!I have lived by this but describe it as soul. Product soul will emit what you call personality throughout the cycles and be the wind beneath your wings. Make it sing My $0.02.

    1. fredwilson

      soul, voice, personalitythey are all the same basic concept with slightly different nuancesit is critical that software have it 

      1. Denim Smith

        exactly.  MVPersonality,  Free Range Chicken Theory, or American Idol Success Recipe.  Too many startups are rolling thin products off a formulaic assembly line these days hoping that something sticks.  Large corporations that have lost their gusto should read this post.

  36. Fernando Gutierrez

    AMAZING POST. I’M GONNA WRITE ALL CAPS ALL DAY TO CELEBRATE.

    1. David Noël

      AVC: THE ONLY PLACE ON THE WEB WHERE ALLCAPS = POSITIVE.Oh, and then there’s this guy: http://twitter.com/POLITEAL

      1. fredwilson

        it’s not just all caps that is a positive. it is the oddball character of it that is positive. as the grimster says, we need personality. boring is bad

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          WORLD SUPPLY OF BORING IN NO DANGER OF RUN OUT. NO ADD MORE.

        2. David Noël

          True!

    2. Alex Murphy

      SEPT 29 IS ALL CAPS DAY

      1. Bo Sartain

        REMEMBER, GRIM HARD CORE, USE SHIFT KEY EVERY TIME NO CAP LOCK

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          IT TRUE.

  37. Tom Labus

    Da Dino:  ON FIRE!!Your tail go crazy when you see a good product?

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME, GRIMLOCK, NOT DOG. ME DINO!

      1. falicon

        All your replies are fun, interesting, and thought-provoking…but this is my all time favorite! 🙂

      2. JamesHRH

        Zazzle T come in Ladies small for my daughter?

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          CONTROLS RIGHT THERE ON PAGE. CAN SELECT DIFFERENT SHIRT OR SIZE.UX KIND OF CRAP. THAT PART NOT THING GRIMLOCK CAN CHANGE WITHOUT SPEND WEEKEND BUILD BETTER ZAZZLE.

          1. Carl J. Mistlebauer

            If you can build a better Zazzle in a weekend I want to hire you!

      3. Tom Labus

        easy, Dino, easy!

  38. Brad Lindenberg

    GRIMLOCKThe irony here is that you are actually a great example of what your blog post talks about. I don’t think it’s easy to maintain an MVP. You need to be in character at every brand touch point.Another good example is MailChimp. They have 900,000 users because they made email delivery fun by using a Monkey as their mascot. It’s estimated they generate $170m in revenue on a head count of around 70 people because they have wrapped their product in a monkey character.http://www.quora.com/How-mu…To put this into perspective ConstantContact are a listed email service provider with 730 full time employees and until recently had a market cap of $800m on $170m revenue.Does this make MailChimp a $1bn business and did it get there because the product had a personality that envoked emotion and generated word of mouth? I’d say so.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      IT NOT IRONIC. IT ON PURPOSE. ‘<

    2. fredwilson

      yessss

    3. JamesHRH

      This is a commodity business you are describing.There is, in fact, nothing wrong with being boring. MIchael Dell did OK being, in his words ‘like a 8×11 piece of paper: vanilla, clean edges, inexpensive, useful.”Amazon doesn’t exactly sing out an MVP – because Jeff Bezos is the Micheal Dell of the web: business process geek, back office efficiencies to the Nth level, packages other people’s goods and distributes them. Vanilla, clean edges, inexpensive, useful – he doesn’t like to charge people more, etc.More than one way to skin a cat – GRIM has nailed this way.Some people can’t stand Mailchimp styled services (‘bugger off with the cutesy, I just need to manage some email marketing.’)Most 20 somethings are not like that, which is why, as a default PoV, both Fred & GRIM are giving great advice – your mostly likely adoptees are going to dig the voice / MVP.

      1. Brad Lindenberg

        Commoditisation is the key word here. The inflection point where personality becoming necessary in a product is at the point in time when a product becomes perceived to be commoditised – but you shouldn’t wait for that to happen or you’ll end up like Dell. Commoditised products open up doors for competitors who have voice.Dell is a great example. Dell was great at delivering PC’s at low prices in the 90’s and back then they were the defecato computer brand. Every week I’d get a flyer in the mail and they would be advertising Intel’s latest processors at ever increasing megahertz, until processors become commoditised and Moores law stopped applying to me. Today we do most of our computing in the cloud so processor power is becoming less relevant than ever before. So what happened? Apple came in with voice, personality and great branding and the world fell in love with them. They bought emotion and style to computing. They are the rockstar in GRIMLOCKS photo. The 20 somethings are using Macs, not Dells. They are the ones using MailChimp not ConstantContact. They are the puck we need to skate to, and to get their attention you can’t be a “me too”. HP is trying to sell its hardware division, IBM sold theirs to Lenovo a long time ago. Apple profits doubled last quarter off an already sky high base. Personality is powerful.Yes there is nothing wrong with boring, but you’re not skating to the puck if you’re boring. Boring is unimaginative and imagination sells. Think of Avatar. Blue lizards running around a make believe jungle made us wear 3D glasses and became the highest grossing movie of all time. Life is commoditised and people will shell out money to de-commoditise it, or as the GRIMSTER puts it:WORLD ALREADY FULL OF THINGS DO WORK. MOST BORING. Another example of this is ETSY. It is the de-commoditisation of eBay & Amazon by only allowing products that do not sell on those platforms. eBay & Amazon are ETSY’s “enemy” and their strict curation guidelines give the site personality and strong values. Their users do not want to be seen as boring.NOW HAVE MISSION, VALUES, ENEMY. THAT ENOUGH FOR MINIMUM VIABLE PERSONALITY. There are so many examples of personality winning. Think about 37Signals. They have this borderline arrogant personality they convey through their blogs and books (think “Rework”) and they are ROCKSTARS in the web app world because of it. Until now the power of technology and software has spoken for itself and we’ve traded boring for powerful but with open source etc anyone with a computer science degree can build stuff thats powerful, but to build something powerful and fun and engaging is a lot more difficult.

        1. Brad Lindenberg

          What should be noted is that the power of the internet is enabling our unique voices to be heard, and that is revolutionary.

          1. testtest

            it could be so much more

        2. JamesHRH

          I am pro-GRIM and pro-GRIMVP – but you have a personality whether it  is vibrant or not.Micheal Dell has friends (still) – lots of them. So does Jeff Bezos (he has more right now, obv).If Jeff showed up here, would you tell him to pick it up in the personality Dept? He’d look at you like you had three heads.And, for clarity here, Dell didn’t stagnate – the entire PC market did. They got hammered with a pretty killer 1-2 punch: awesome & closed takes the high end (iOS); open & free takes everybody else (Android). It turns out that, no matter how much you are killing it during the open and not free era, if you are not much better than the free stuff and not free, well, Houston, we have a problem.And, another clarification here, Apple has very little voice, ever since they became the big dog. Mac versus PC has not aired in (guessing here) 18 months. Founder is really ill (not like he’s out on the PR circuit) and new CEO has totally drank the Kool-Aid, but he’s the supply chain wizard (see comment re: corporate execs being Dellzos not GRIMVPs, somewhere!).So it turns out, personality from the big dog is not so cool. Its kind of like she’s rubbing it in. Almost all of your examples are Personality strong startups that are market leaders of sub-categories of bland, monster baseline brands (etsy/ebay; 37Signals/Gartner, etc.)What does that tell you?I love this post – but, before you jailbreak your cage and torch the barn, you should know where the farmer is and just how many foxes are outside……..Market positioning is seeing where the puck is goingGRIMVP is how to put it in the net.

      2. aslevin

        MailChimp isn’t just cutesy. The cutesy is icing. As a user of MailChimp and a couple of competitors, I can say that MailChimp has really really good UX.  They take awkward and error-prone processes and make them simple.  It’s not just pretty – plenty of apps have nice-looking user interfaces that aren’t easy to use.  MailChimp is easy to use. You can turn off the goofy error messages (which is in-character in itself). But the goofiness doesn’t make the product.

  39. William Mougayar

    HEY GRIMLOCK….will you be coming to Fred’s get together on Nov 8, and if so will you be dressed as a GRIMLOCK?

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      THIS FIRST ME, GRIMLOCK, HEAR ABOUT IT.

        1. Ro Gupta

          Been trying to get him up to NYC for a #NOEATUP. GRIMLOCK SAY HE LIKE IDEA, so let’s see – claws crossed.

          1. William Mougayar

            I THOUGHT HE LOCATED IN NYC.GRIMLOCK, THIS IS YOUR DAY TO ANSWER QUESTIONS: WHERE YOU LOCATED- OR IS THAT SECRET JUNGLE LOCATION? ——————————————————————————— FORGIVE GRAMMAR CAUSE SPEAK TO GRIMLOCK

          2. Donna Brewington White

            “Hearing” you speak Grimlock has made my day, William.

          3. William Mougayar

            IT’S NEW LINGO AT VC TODAY. WE ALL ARE PRACTICING GRIMLOCK SKILLS.PUT YOURSELF IN OTHER SEAT AND MIGHT SEE OTHER SIDE.

          4. JamesHRH

            GRIMCAVE NEAR DC.

          5. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            ME, GRIMLOCK, IN DC. IT LIKE SILICON VALLEY, BUT LESS ANNOYING.EXCEPT FOR PART FULL OF POLITICIANS.

          6. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            IT DEPEND ON WHEN LAUNCHING NEXT THING. WILL COORDINATE SOON.

          7. fredwilson

            not sure i want to meet the grimsterit might be like the day i met fake steve jobs

          8. Ro Gupta

            I kinda know what you mean. maybe #NOEATUP should be pseudonyms and masks only.

          9. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            IF ME, GRIMLOCK, GO TO EVENT…NO TELL ANYONE WHICH OF US GRIMLOCK.THEN IT WORK GREAT. ‘<

          10. Alex Murphy

            I think you already know him.  – Lives in CO  – Obviously very in touch with modern web  – understands the pig  – has a different point of view  – perhaps he has founded something, not quite a start up, maybe something similar  – perhaps that something has spread to NY … hmm, who is this masked crusader.

      1. LE

        Something to think about… I’m not sure it’s good for the FG brand to be attached to an actual person (at this point). You need a different venue and a little more widespread fame before your coming out party. (I’m not kidding.)The way this is going it could end up with a stipple portrait on the front page of the WSJ.  Keep the mystery a little longer. 

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          OOPS.

        2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          ME RETRACT STATEMENT. READ IN FORMAT NO SHOW CONTEXT DANGEROUS.YOU RIGHT, LE. APPEAR IN PERSON THING GRIMLOCK HAND OUT CAREFULLY.HAVE TO BE 4TH LEVEL TWITTER FOLLOWER FIRST. SO FAR ONLY 4 PEOPLE MAKE IT.

          1. LE

            Yup. I was perplexed at your response. I wrote it thinking it was good advice and your response didn’t seem to indicate that you understood what I was saying since it didn’t match your personain any way.(I’ve gotten one of my companies on the front page of the WSJ(no stipple though) and another company has been mentioned in multiple NYT stories.  And I mean “I” as without PR firm help.)

          2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            WITH NO CONTEXT, READ LIKE VERY SILLY THING TO SAY.WITH CONTEXT, MAKE SENSE.@DISQUS HAVE LOTS OF UX ISSUES. THIS ONE.

  40. scott crawford

    MUST SHARE FRIENDS

  41. Dan Cornish

    Great post!  My take away is build a great product you love with personality and be a bad-ass chicken.

  42. Mike Kijewski

    DEV NO PERSONALITY, PRODUCT NO PERSONALITY. MAYBE GOOGLE USE BRIGGS-MEYERS.

  43. Dan Hill

    I nearly cried when I saw FakeG had done a guest blog post on AVC. What a day.

    1. fredwilson

      yeah, i told him in the comments about a week ago that he had an open invite. i couldn’t wait to see what he’d come up with

  44. Mark Schoneveld

    NO ONE GONNA EAT THIS CHICKEN. (damn straight)

  45. leigh

    Now that we’ve covered off don’t be boring, maybe @FakeGrimlock:disqus your next post can be about “no more stupid”  🙂

  46. Dave Pinsen

    Time to cash in, Grim: tell Fred you’ll expand this into a short biz book using his portfolio company that lets you write books online (Watpad?). He’ll blog about it, commenters here will buy it, and buzz will flow for your book and the portfolio co.If Purple Cow could sell as many books as it has, you should be able to sell plenty with this (too bad Purple Dinosaur is already taken).Great drawings, btw. If you did them yourself, you have real talent.

    1. FAKEFAMEGRIMLOCK

      PURPLE DINO NOT BE ORIGINAL AFTER PURPLE COW.COPY NOT PERSONALITY. COPY BE COPY.MANY STARTUP MAKE THIS MISTAKE.HUR HUR.

      1. JamesHRH

        Argh – my head hurts. What does that make you?!?

      2. FAKE FAKE GRIMLOCK

        ME MAKE TYPO IN MY NAME ABOVE.MEANT WAS “FAKE FAKE GRIMLOCK”.(SOFTWARE THAT RUN ME HAVE BUG. IT AUTO-FIXING NOW.)

    2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ALREADY HAVE PLANS. STAY TUNED.

    3. Mark Essel

      Bingo!There’s a trajectory here that goes over the horizon, and you can bet FG’s got a crafty mastermind plan.

  47. laurie kalmanson

    this post is made of win

    1. Carl Rahn Griffith

      And bacon 🙂

  48. ShanaC

    1) GRIMLOCK do you do your own drawings? I like them.2) How do you decide what friend to be, what personality? I have lots of different kinds of friends, some wild, some mild, some bubbly, some serious. Most are multidimentionable. How do you know what personality works for your product? Or personality parts?3) Don’t be a flaky personality, all flash and no follow through.4) Happy Toshiba Hashannah and Fall y’all

    1. fredwilson

      i am pretty sure he did all the drawingshappy new year shana

      1. Vasudev Ram

        Here is where he says he is doing the drawings (and writing the guest post for  @fredwilson ):http://fakegrimlock.com/201

    2. Rohan

      happy new year 🙂

    3. Farhan Lalji

      Happy New Year.

    4. RichardF

      Happy New Year Shana

    5. JamesHRH

      His tweet stream said he was drawing.Do you think he paid someone to do those?  😛

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        GRIMLOCK GOOD AT DRAW.GOOD AT CODE.CAN SING AND COOK TOO.BUT NO DO WINDOWS.

        1. JamesHRH

          No get coffee……hur hur

    6. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      1. YES. THIS TIME WITH TABLET.OTHER EXAMPLES (PEN, PENCIL):yfrog.com/kjaglhjjyfrog.com/klts8arjyfrog.com/kjrx3vwjyfrog.com/h2c2bmyjyfrog.com/h0wjzxfdjyfrog.com/gy657yfjYFROG ALSO HAVE POSTERS, LIKE yfrog.com/gza50jj yfrog.com/gye7e8j http://yfrog.com/h2iyo6j2. BE SELF, THAT HOW.3. YES.4. HOORAY!

      1. ShanaC

        You’re very good – favorite kind of pencil and paper?

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          WHATEVER HANDY.DRAW MORE IMPORTANT THAT WHAT DRAW WITH.

          1. ShanaC

            I personally disagree with this – then again I’ve been told I get “activated by materials” that I like (such as really dark pencils…I couldn’t live without a 6b). i realized recently it is a lot like learning to code – some languages you’ll “get” initially some you won’t because it “activates” you….Random suggestion: You’re really good – try some color! See what works for you, what doesn’t…

          2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            MATERIALS LIKE FANCY RUNNING SHOES.MAYBE ADD 10%. NOT MAKE ANYONE OLYMPIC ATHLETE.DO COLOR ALL TIME. JUST NOT WITH PENCIL AND BLACK INK PEN.LATEST WORK: yfrog.com/hscdr5oj

          3. ShanaC

            That’s somewhat true. i still hold by my opinion that better tools will make you a better programmer/artist…

    7. Brad Lindenberg

      Happy New Year 🙂 (from Australia!)

  49. EmilSt

    Brilliant post!Turn strangers into friends. This is life motto. The problem in real life was that you can make much more friends than you can maintain. With social networks you can stay engaged with your friends.So make friends and keep them engaged.

  50. Luis

    “PERSONALITY MAKE PRODUCT FRIEND. YOU HELP FRIEND. YOU FORGIVE WHEN FRIEND NOT PERFECT. YOU WANT FRIEND WIN. “It reminds me how early-adopters are usually friendly people always open to make new friends and how well you should treat them when you release something that is new but still buggy.Awesome post.

  51. Douglas Crets

    The reason people like TechCrunch and Arrington, partly because of this. The reason they look at ReadWriteWeb and shrug, partly because of lack of this. 

  52. sebastianconcept

    brilliant :DPersonality is API for loyalty <– genius mantra!

  53. Nate Quigley

    PERSONALITY MAKE PRODUCT FRIEND. YOU HELP FRIEND. YOU FORGIVE WHEN FRIEND NOT PERFECT. YOU WANT FRIEND WIN.Absolutely brilliant.Best part for me is thinking about how GRIM has been living this stuff as he’s created his “PRODUCT” in this community. Always insightful comments = “Works”. Giant Robot Dinosaur = “Interesting”.EVERYONE CARE ABOUT AND TALK ABOUT PRODUCT = WIN

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      GRIMLOCK IS LEAN STARTUP WITH MISSION TO BE GRIMLOCK. ‘<

  54. Neil Braithwaite

    I LOVE BACON!

  55. laurie kalmanson

    WIN WIN WIN– personality is exactly the hardest thing to get right, and the thing that the more hands touch gets most diluted. scaling up shake shack and keeping the warmth that other ushg ventures have looks like the hardest part of that franchise; anyone can cook a burger.– faux personality in a product/experience is the cold breath of an overly processed attempt at being human: the repetitive annoyance of overly cute/chirpy/chatty branded emails elicit the instant delete.i can tell you from my own experience that any success i’ve had is due to being true.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      UNCANNY VALLEY APPLY TO MARKETING TOO.TRY TO BE HUMAN AND FAIL WORSE THAN NOT HUMAN AT ALL.

      1. laurie kalmanson

        tres true; truer than true. uncanny valley is a scary bad place. don’t go there.

    2. JamesHRH

      Authenticity is really hard to fake.Authenticity takes self-knowledge, assurance and maturity: when those things are missing, anyone can tell.Keep to the true that is true for you.

      1. laurie kalmanson

        <3

  56. Douglas Crets

    What I read here is the reason why I don’t agree with people who say you don’t need to hire a social media manager who understands metaphor, hyperbole, listening, conversation and loyalty. If you have someone like a giant robot dinosaur on your team to create content and guide the master strokes of that content into the lives of people, you develop the Loyalty API. I am freely available for such hiring. I have a poetry degree, a journalism degree, and a giant shed in the back of my apartment, where my giant robot dinosaur lives. Actually, I live in the shed out back. The dinosaur sleeps over here on the couch. He makes me sit out in the shed most nights. 

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      HURR HURR. YOU BRAIN NOT WORK RIGHT, BUT IT IN RIGHT WAY.

  57. Carl J. Mistlebauer

    A few relevant quotes from Aldous Huxley, A Brave New World:”And that,’ put in the Director sententiously, ‘that is the secret of happiness and virtue-liking what you’ve got to do.  All conditioning aims at that: making people like their inescapable social destiny.’ “”The individual feels and the community reels.”

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      REVOLUTION HAPPEN WHEN GOOD BREAK MONOPOLY OF EVIL ON GET THINGS DONE.

      1. Carl J. Mistlebauer

        Good can never break the monopoly of evil until individuals act as individuals. Evil always lurks in groups.

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          GROUP BOUND WITH EVIL IS STRONG.GROUP BOUND WITH GOOD IS STRONGER.

  58. Guest

    Love the chicken drawing!

  59. falicon

    Instant classic.

  60. andyswan

    so goodopinion and passion deliver interest and loyalty, but also hate.  being hated is not a bad thing.ask rush, drudge, arianna, coulter, fox, obama, jobs, palin, vader and kobedon’t be afraid to be hated.  it means you’re creating an emotional response.  it also probably means you’re being true to your core and unlikely to be misdirected or wishy washy in the future.let the diffident and weak chase popularity.  we’re here to fucking win.p.s. i wish disqus and twitter had “hate” buttons.  

    1. laurie kalmanson

      yes, the fox empire is built on personality: bad, rotten, corrupt, lying personality but personality nonetheless, and they mock the objective media on exactly that countin the early days of newspapers, each was the house organ of a party or a cause and they spoke accordingly. objective copy was born with the telegraph and the possibility of mass advertising, mass audience and mass mediait’s back to the beginning now with social media, and voice is what sets one channel apart from anotheralso, WIN WIN WIN

      1. Chet

        If only Fox could be “honest” like CNN, MSNBC, and others who agree with your views.  Let me guess…liberal?  The most closed minded people on the planet.  I love the anger – everyone who disagrees is a lying racist homophobe.

        1. SubstrateUndertow

          I sense a disturbance in your force !Perhaps a ideological Substrate Undertow ?

    2. Cam MacRae

      Or in the words of a sage gen Y poet:Love me or hate me, it’s still an obsession;Love me or hate me, that is the question;If you love me then thank you!If you hate me then f#$% you!- Lady Sovereign

    3. ErikSchwartz

      Hate is an emotional connection.

    4. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      LIARS HATE THE HONEST.THE HONEST HATE LIARS.HATE NOT TELL YOU WHICH ONE WHICH.

      1. Alex Murphy

        dude, who are you? You are epic with your lines, your post, your insights.  Fantastic.thanks for being here and for writing this post!

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          THAT EASY. GRIMLOCK IS GRIMLOCK.AND YOU WELCOME.

          1. panterosa,

            Wondering if you enjoy your anonymity as much as I enjoy mine. There is such an expansiveness to it. I am quite sure I will never be as popular as you. But then, that’s not my goal.

          2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            EVERYTHING GRIMLOCK DO ON PURPOSE, HAVE MEANING.INCLUDE BE GRIMLOCK.

          3. JamesHRH

            GRIM not hiding – GRIM plotting world domination (need secrecy for that).

    5. Alex Murphy

      this is a great comment.

    6. fredwilson

      plenty of hate being dished out in disqus every day. you don’t need a button to hate.

    7. Nick

      ASK HITLER.

  61. theschnaz

    Wow, a Grimlock only post.  Awesome on so many levels!

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME, GRIMLOCK, LEVEL 20 AWESOME #1STED

  62. saranyan

    Personality makes product a friend! Love it. A beautiful post.

  63. johndodds

    Good marketers do all this already – it’s just that there aren’t that many of them out there. Personality is and always has been part of marketing. Some people call that branding but they don’t know the difference between a business’s DNA and a skin-deep overlay.

  64. Rob Ganjon

    FAKE GRIMLOCK GENIUS.  SHOULD WRITE BOOK.  WITH PICTURES.  SPEAK LIKE HIM ALL DAY.  MY TRIBUTE.

    1. Nathan Hangen

      Reminds me a bit of a book I read called “Buddhism for Bears.” Now that I understand where grim is coming from, I think I could read a book too.

    2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      IN WORKS.

    3. Alex Murphy

      Dr Seuss for startups!

  65. u. gnome

    Phase 1: Get PersonalityPhase 2: ????????????Phase 3: Win!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1. Patrick Denny

      Actually it’s Phase 1: BUILD SHITPhase 2: WRAP SHIT IN BACONPhase 3: PROFIT.At least, that’s what I got out of it.

      1. JamesHRH

        More like: build what you would want to buy, commit to it like a pig commits to bacon, profit.

        1. u. gnome

          i’m not sure the pig understands that it’s committing to bacon?  and i’m not sure that a pig would want to buy bacon?  but i have no doubt that your line is the kind of pithy, mixed-metaphor, pseudo-intellect that works well ’round these parts.

          1. JamesHRH

            I will give you the benefit of the doubt. I am referencing the pigs&chickens / bacon&eggs commitment meme because it is a well known meme that refers to how much you should care about things. Obviously, its not meant to be literal.That Patrick would take what he took from GRIM”s post deserved to be called out – he is missing the point, as are you.The thesis to the post is: make something, turn strangers into friends, have courage / get out there. How is that pseudo-intellectual? And its an original meme from a brilliant source.The biggest issue, everywhere, is to get people to give a shitAVC is a service that gives a shit. Starts with the bartender. Then the instigators and regulars build from there.That you and Patrick don’t care enough to engage, ask ( someone just found out what API meant today, that’s a big deal if you think about it ) and can only contribute negatively is your problem.I will happily meet you for a drink and take your intellect out for a little exercise, though.I cover WestCan & SoCal. Would guess @JLM will take TX. And BTW, AVC has a big geo-footprint.

          2. u. gnome

            conflating memes for insight is the issue. some people understand math and talk in terms of models. others don’t and talk in terms of parables, metaphors, analogies, and, yes, internet memes. i like drinking, though. if you’re ever in the real america we should meet up. i’m certain we have more similarities than differences. i’m sure once you’re drunk enough you start making sense 😉

          3. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            + ALL.

          4. JamesHRH

            Coffee makes me make sense about things..Cocktails makes me make sense about everything.I am in the leveraged portion of the continent regularly – I’ll keep it in mind.

          5. fredwilson

            do you ever get to NYC?we could try both drugs

          6. fredwilson

            do you ever get to NYC?we could try both drugs

      2. u. gnome

        in fairness to today’s guest editor, our whole economy is a turd wrapped in bacon. it was only “2008-current” that we came to realize that what we thought was chicken salad is really chicken shit.

      3. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        NO.

        1. calabs

          Eloquent response. I believe you are talking about integrating action from top to bottom, from the grossest action to the subtlest, from practical superficial to what happens deep down in your gut. You are talking about nothing less than finding the resistance in the world that you care most about, and pushing against it because pushing feels good, and letting the joy of that effort light up the world.As for me, nothing angers me more than injustice, particularly of the petty, systematic kind where large organizations manipulate the ignorance of many to concentrate wealth and power into the hands of a few. That’s a barn that needs burnin’.

    2. laurie kalmanson

      4: profits!!!!!!!

  66. MarkUry

    Grim, the last illo is gold. I lol’d, then turned around to make sure there wasn’t some tough-ass chicken about to clobber me.

  67. David

    LIKE!

  68. AndyGCook

    Possibly my favorite Grimlock momenthttp://www.youtube.com/watc…And awesome post. The fact that I read through the entire post when it was in ALL CAPS and third person broken English means it was on point.

  69. Authy

    ha this is beyond awesome !

  70. Authy

    this is beyond awesome !

  71. panterosa,

    GRIM SEEM TOUGH. BUT GRIM NOT ALL TOUGH. GRIM SWEET TOO.GRIM MAKE BACON SWEET. GRIM LIKE FRIEND. GRIM LIKE PUPPY. GRIM LIKE SWEET PRODUCTS. GRIM LIKE CARE. GRIM LIKE CHICKEN’S REVENGE. GRIM LIKE WIN.WIN=SWEET.GRIM TAKE COFFEE WITH SUGAR?

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      TAKE COFFEE WITH BARRISTA.

      1. panterosa,

        BARRISTA SWEETEN GRIM.

  72. reece

    be baconamazing stuffthanks @FakeGrimlock:disqus 

    1. Matt A. Myers

      I might show up to AVC meetup wearing a bacon costume..

      1. reece

        hahah… awesome

        1. localengine

          A chicken would work too.

          1. Alex Murphy

            Angry Chickens vs Monkeys (from RIO)

      2. Mark Essel

        As long as you’re carrying a tray of freshly crisped bacon samples I support this costume.

      3. ShanaC

        wear a sweater, it gets colder that time of year in NY

  73. zubinwadia

    The imagery of the flipped over fox by hulk chicken is priceless. 

    1. fredwilson

      indeed

  74. Wannapreneur

    My Take Away from GRIMLOCK PERSONALITY = INTERESTING. INTERESTING = CARE. CARE = TALK.  EVERYONE CARE AND TALK ABOUT PRODUCT? YOU WIN.

    1. JamesHRH

      IF NO PERSONALITY, CARE = REALLY FRIGGING USEFUL / REALLY BIG NEED FILLED.Surgeons are famous for their God complexes. Nobody likes them. But when your aorta explodes…….

      1. localengine

        Quality of product could be impeccable too with nothing else – but then that sort of becomes part of your personality..

  75. Sam Birmingham

    Not bad artwork for a Giant Robot Dinosaur who lacks opposable thumbs

    1. Dave W Baldwin

      He probably made someone else do it….

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        NO.IT 100% GRIMLOCK.

        1. Dave W Baldwin

          Was kidding, painting illusion of giant robot standing behind nervous animator.Once again, very good!

          1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            ‘<

    2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      AM ROBOT. CAN TRANSFORM.

  76. Paul Pedrazzi

    Simple.  Powerful.  Correct.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      THAT GOOD DESCRIPTION OF ME, GRIMLOCK, BUT WHAT YOU THINK OF POST?

      1. Paul Pedrazzi

        POST OK, IT NO GRIMLOCK.

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          WHY THINK THAT?

  77. Matt A. Myers

    EPIC RATING 9000+ALSO EPIC http://www.youtube.com/watc…P.S. Printing and putting some of those cartoons on my wall when I get home, so I can remind myself to not lose track of the why – the why I am doing what I am doing is what gets me excited and allows my personality to dance and get others dancing with me; The stress from having so much to do without the help I need yet flattens me – it really sucks.. So thanks Mr. Dinosaur.

  78. Josh Ledgard

    Great post – That’s why we try and share more personality every day @Kickofflabs for our customers. 

  79. Acheron

    Oh god this made my day.

    1. Matt A. Myers

      This made my month, if not year.

    2. fredwilson

      me too. way better than the nonsense the rabbi was spewing at shul

      1. K_Berger

        You needed RABBI GRIMLOCK…DO GOOD.NO DO BAD.HAVE HAPPY NEW YEAR.

        1. Robert Holtz

          A Rabbi @FakeGrimlock:disqus could be something.But not a Mohel.  If he tried to perform a bris with those tiny T-Rex arms, the infant is bound to run away like that chicken running from the cage he smashed and the barn he burned down.Grimster, you da man.  Definitely tweeted your post.

          1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            ME, GRIMLOCK, ONLY CUT THINGS ME EAT.IT LIMIT CAREER OPTIONS.

        2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          ME, GRIMLOCK, LIKE CHURCH OF BILL AND TED.1. BE EXCELLENT TO OTHERS2. PARTY ONEVERYTHING ELSE JUST QUIBBLE OVER DETAILS.

          1. K_Berger

            I think that’s basically the same thing, you just got it down to two bullets.  🙂

  80. Elia Freedman

    West Coast so I am always late to this party… I wanted to point out how appropriate this post is after yesterday’s Kindle Fire announcement. Three companies all center-stage on this one: Amazon, Apple and Google. All three have such amazing personalities in the tech space and all three are either loved or hated.Great job, FAKEGRIMLOCK! This goes in my collection of great posts to refer back to.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME SAY THANK YOU!

  81. Tim Cohn

    #grimlockquotes reminds me of Caveman Lawyer Keyrock.

  82. Ro Gupta

    Had high expectations: http://twitter.com/#!/ro_gu… and yet @FakeGrimlock:disqus managed to exceed them. In awe.But yeah, I think personality/brand along with network effects are the only real ways to gain lasting defensibility in web software these days. Everything else can just be copied or improved upon by others so easily and rapidly.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      FEATURE, CODE, ART EASY TO COPY. PERSONALITY ONLY IP NEVER BE STOLEN. 

      1. Tarikh Korula

        Damn you’re good

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          YES.

  83. Farhan Lalji

    Here’s a question, can big companies have MVP?  I believe Google does (with their doodles they’ve shown personality), but struggle to think of other big companies that leverage personality.

    1. laurie kalmanson

      nordstrom magically hires/trains/reinforces kindness and friendliness in their salespeople so that it really becomes self-reinforcingi think 90 percent of it is recruiting/selecting; the rest is reward/culture

      1. JamesHRH

        Great example.

    2. JamesHRH

      Apple.The trick is to hold the voice as you scale and new people take over, wait for it @fredwilson:disqus   Marketing!This happens in any large company – senior execs come in and need to make a mark. Nobody got famous (and a big bonus) by saying: ‘what we are doing works, my plan is to just do more of the same.’Coke should still be focused on ‘The Real Thing’ as their slogan. A brand can only be so big. If the company needs to grow, then they need new brands (but most corporate execs are low on MVP – they are more Dell/Bezos (see above) and this scares them off).The list of huge companies that had great MVP but lost their DNA over time is endless: IBM, Coke, pick a US car maker, etc.

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        MVPER SELLS TO EMPLOYEES SAME AS CUSTOMERS.ONCE COMPANY SOLD, EXECUTIVE NO CAN CHANGE.

        1. JamesHRH

          See post above – Apple losing its voice. yes, I am changing my mind mid-AVC marathon.No Mac versus PC ads. New CEO is supply chain / on time trains wizard.History says the MVP gets distorted over time. Lew Gerstner’s book on  IBM – old man Watson said ‘dress like your customer’ up until 1954; in 1990’s IBMers wore suits into meetings in the Valley.I mean, it took 40 years to build the IBM culture and 40 to wreck it, but,  history is against you here.

          1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            APPLE IS ONLY GOOD EXAMPLE FOR APPLE BECAUSE ONLY STEVE IS STEVE.

          2. JamesHRH

            If that is true, then GRIM only good example for GRIM………

          3. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            @jameshrh:disqus ME, GRIMLOCK, NOT STEVE JOBS.PROBABLY.

  84. Steve Hallock

    I love this

  85. JamesHRH

    Now noone has an excuse!

  86. matthughes

    Can’t stop laughing…Chock-full of wisdom. Just terrific –

  87. Aaron Klein

    Love this post.We launched Riskalyze.com into Public Beta last night, and one of the issues is the 12-15 seconds of intense math to calculate the optimal portfolio for each user.So we did our best to show off our voice. I’m sure plenty of people won’t like it. But we think it’s funny and keeps users entertained for a few seconds.Here are a few of the status messages that flash on the screen while the algorithms are calculating your portfolio:Crunching your Risk Fingerprint…Flipping the switches…Double-checking the math…Making the jump to light speed…Examining possible correlations…Ordering our assistants to hurry up…Pulling pricing data from the markets…Carry the 10…Telling the captain ‘we need more power!’…Wondering if your name is really Warren Buffett…Reassuring our CEO that you’re still here…Updating our protocol droid’s software…Calculating your wealth under the Gold Standard…There are more, and if you want to see them all, AVCers are welcome to check it out at http://riskalyze.com. 🙂

    1. Dale Allyn

      Congratulations on your public beta launch, Aaron. Good luck to you and your team!

      1. Aaron Klein

        Thanks Dale!

    2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME LIKE!

      1. Aaron Klein

        THAT IS HIGH COMPLIMENT COMING FROM FAVORITE DINOSAUR. YOU WRITE GOOD POST.

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          ME SAY THANK YOU!

    3. Alex Murphy

      Sweet.  I like seeing husbands and dads launch newcos!  Best of luck.  22 year olds shouldn’t have all the fun. 🙂

      1. Aaron Klein

        Thanks Alex – I agree! I think you can be a great startup CEO and a great dad…it just takes work. 🙂

    4. JamesHRH

      Carry the 10 is my fave. Althought Buffet line pretty good.And congrats on breaking out of the cage, burning down the barn and killing the fox.Personally, I think trashing the tractor was overkill.

      1. Aaron Klein

        Thanks! We’re thinking of taking user suggestions. It seems to have been a hit during the launch today. 🙂

        1. JamesHRH

          “BUY!BUY!BUY!””SELLSELLSELL!”:-)

    5. fredwilson

      congrats on your launch

      1. Aaron Klein

        Thanks Fred 🙂

    6. Eric Tarn

      Reticulating splines…

      1. Aaron Klein

        Love it!

    7. Nick

      Calculating PI

      1. Aaron Klein

        🙂

    8. Mark Essel

      Tried it out and dug it.Interesting set of questions that revealed a little about what I would do with my 401k. I’d prefer startups/broad angel/vc funds to stock risk though.

      1. Aaron Klein

        Thanks for checking it out, Mark! We’ve only delivered a fraction of our vision but we’re getting there.It’ll be very interesting when you can see if you have the risk tolerance to do a startup. That’s definitely possible with our algorithms…just not as easy on users as tossing public stocks, ETFs and mutual funds into the mix.

    9. ShanaC

      Ooo congrats!

    10. Nick

      NO WANT FACEBOOK, TWITTER SIGNUP. SITE NO GOOD FOR ME.

      1. Aaron Klein

        YOU IN LUCK. WE LAUNCH USERNAME + PASSWORD ACCOUNTS TOMORROW AFTERNOON. (It’s just so much fun speaking Robot Dinosaur.)

  88. Mark

    Damn. I needed this.Thank you GRIMLOCK and Fred.

  89. gorbachev

    SMALL WORDS + SIMPLE PICTURES = BIG ARTICLEIN SOVIET RUSSIA, GRIMLOCK IS LIKE

  90. Andy

    Could not stop laughing after the Heart + Talk = Rock Out illustration. Great post

  91. George Haines

    I’d like to write a rebuttal from Solomon Grundy.

  92. Trish Burgess-Curran

    I cannot stop laughing or thinking…  There is certainly a lot of truth to it, put in such a simple and fun way!  I want to be like GRIMLOCK when I grow up!

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      THAT REQUIRE LOTS OF GROWING.LAST TIME CHECK, MOST HUMANS STOP AROUND 6′.

      1. Carl J. Mistlebauer

        My mom is 6′ and she is the shortest in the family…..

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          ONLY NEED 44′ MORE, AND YOU DINO SIZED!

  93. Dave W Baldwin

    Love it FG.

  94. Peter Beddows

    TERRIFIC: NO BE CHICKEN SUMS UP BEAUTIFULLY.THIS GOT TO BOOKMARK FOR FUTURE REF.QUOTES COME IN HANDY WHEN DEALING WITH … FILL IN BLANK HERE!

  95. BradDorchinecz

    DAY READING GRIMLOCK COMMENTS = GOOD DAYDAY READING GRIMLOCK GUEST POST = BETTER DAYDAY READING GRIMLOCK CARTOONS = BEST DAY!

  96. Thomas Westmoreland

    Holy gods I love this soooooo much! “No one going to eat this chicken” indeed.

  97. Brian Egan

    Thank you, thank you, thank you.  This is ART and nothing less.  It’s written about “product” but I would broaden it to “brand”.  It should permeate every impression and/or interaction that your brand has, from the technology product to how the phones are answered and everything in between.NO ONE GOING TO EAT THIS CHICKEN = NEW STARTUP OFFICE MOTTO

  98. Vitomir Jevremovic

    reading and liking posts, that is what is done today. Crazy day it is

  99. Donna Brewington White

    This is freaking brilliant, FG! Thank you!No all caps or Grimster lingo from me today but cannot tell you how much this post inspires me.  Tons of takeaway even for MY business! For life!You need to find some sort of distribution for “Daily Grimster” wisdom.  A quote a day.  Save the world, FG.  (And, yes, this is thinking small, I know — endless possibilities.)So much for your day job.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      WORKING ON IT.

    2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      UNTIL THEN, LOOK AT @GROK:twitter https://twitter.com/#!/GROK

  100. William Mougayar

    FAKEGRIMLOCK = YOGI BERRA IF YOGI WAS STARTUP GUY

  101. Nathan Zaru

    “PERSONALITY IS API FOR LOYALTY” – Amen!

  102. Donna Brewington White

    “No one going to eat this chicken!”  Words to live by.This will be added to my favorite quotes about bodacious animals along with “You’ll never call him Fifi again!” (Poodle with a Mohawk)http://www.flickr.com/photo…

  103. muratcannoyan

    Giant Robot Dinosaur always hits the spot. Great Post!

  104. Robert Thuston

    FUCKING LOVE FAKE GRIMLOCK

    1. Alex Murphy

      +1

  105. Nathan Hangen

    This was my favorite part until I read the last paragraph:”IMPROVE WHAT WORK. DELETE WHAT NOT.”I dig it.

  106. anne weiler

    Nikon gets personality wrong. https://www.facebook.com/ni…

  107. testtest

    when systems are pushed to their limit they reverse characteristics.when there’s too much information, there becomes pattern matching. or google.when there’s too much microsoft their becomes applewhen there’s too much talk there becomes ‘just do it’great companies that embody the change ride on the wave of creative destruction, shining no, we are not the old, we are the newthat is where the most powerful personality comes from imho; the embodiment of the revolution. 

    1. JamesHRH

      Great post Chris. Other variants of your comment:Early is wrongRiding the wave is more productive than making the waves.Don’t get too far ahead of the herd ( they may stop following ).

  108. Alex Leverington

    PLUS ONE(love this post)

  109. JamesHRH

    misplaced post – deleted.

  110. Druce

    I hope AVC is converting entirely to this mode of communication. I’ve always felt the content was strong, but simple clear unadorned prose is for suckers.IS SUCH FINE LINE BETWEEN CLEVER AND STUPID. OR BETWEEN PERSONALITY AND ANNOYING AFFECTATION.PERSONALITY ALSO MUST BE AUTHENTIC. AND REFLECT RESPONSIVENESS TO CUSTOMER.SOMETIME CARTOON SPEAK MEAN YOU WANT HIDE SUBSTANCE WITH STYLE, AND THINK CUSTOMER IS IDIOT.

  111. Grant27

    This is tragic.  We don’t add “personality” to brands and products.  Not unless we are caught in a 1950s time warp.  We add meaning, and this gives us vastly more depth and latitude with which to work.  Oh, I get the joke.  Just wish author did.  

  112. Jim Shook

    great addendum to the thoughts expressed in @bfeld:twitter ‘s post via @chrismoodycom:twitter about what “marketing” means for a startup. having a unique voice and industry authority wins..

    1. bfeld

      Totally agree – I thought this was really complimentary to the post I Don’t Hate Marketing

      1. JamesHRH

        You should rename that post I Really like Good Marketing!Totally agree.

  113. Mike Caprio

    Amazing.

  114. Sarah-Jane Morris

    I really, really want to be able to buy a beautiful, large poster of this post. Make it happen.

  115. Steve Poland

    This article on sprouter this week is relevant to this discussion — “Build Your Startup for Early Adopters” — aka, put personality into it and focus on those “friends”.http://www.humbledmba.com/b

  116. Guest

    Talk like Hulk.Scary as Bigfoot. But Fakegrimlock smart.

  117. Ahartman

    Bah, too many words. “ME, GRIMLOCK” was good enough first paragraph. Maybe “RUN, BORING HUMANS” for a second paragraph. Maybe add a bacon picture.

  118. Andrew

    PERSONALITY FOR PRODUCT = BRANDINGThe purpose of branding is to consistently convey the unique personality of a product. To do this you must first find the authentic personality of a product that differentiates it from everyone else. It’s key to find ways to make emotional connections with consumers and humanize a product to give people a reason to care. However, your position must be based on authenticity to work. Just saying something doesn’t make it true…you have to live it every day and convey it through the product, employees and every interaction. His three questions are a fantastic start to defining your unique personality.1. HOW YOU CHANGE CUSTOMER’S LIFE?  2. WHAT YOU STAND FOR? 3. WHO OR WHAT YOU HATE?

  119. Kelley

    As my mom would say, “Products are like men. Most have the minimum viable toolkit, but it’s hell trying to find one with a winning personality.” 

    1. Alex Murphy

      see, now that’s funny!

    2. JamesHRH

      V funny!

    3. fredwilson

      smart mom

    4. fredwilson

      smart mom

    5. ShanaC

      why is that *going to grumble about dating life*

  120. David Petersen

    I saw these ‘Burrito Loading Zone’ signs in the Chipotle parking lot today and immediately thought of this post.

  121. JLM

    GRIM, GREAT STUFF! WELL PLAYED!Feel like I should send you a fatted calf or a couple of water buffalo to nibble on. Something you can really get your teeth into.You have provided us w such meaty fare.The drawings unlock a whole new level of creativity and communication. Wisdom overflows everything.In the future you need to add “drop biscuits” and “country ham” to the bread and bacon metaphor. There are parts of the world which would never touch bacon if country ham were within a hundred miles.Of course they all come from the same pig. And everything is improved, as you have proven, with bacon or country ham.

    1. Donna Brewington White

      This whole time I’ve been envisioning TURKEY bacon.You are ruining it for me!NO EAT SWINE!

    2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      HOORAY! ME UNLOCK PLAY WELL ACHIEVEMENT! BUT STICK WITH BACON. IT LIKE FORCE.HAVE DARK PART, LIGHT PART, AND FLOW THROUGH ALL LIVING BEINGS.EVEN IF SOME TWO-BIT SMUGGLERS NOT BELIEVE IN IT.

  122. aminTorres

    I can’t say how much I love this… so I made a poster to print for my wall.here in case you want it: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/217…

  123. Limekwat Media

    “No one going to eat this chicken.” I keep laughing at that line – absolutely great article.

  124. Charlie Flowers

    WhyTheLuckyStiff, is that you?

  125. Morgan Warstler

    This was perfectly timed.

  126. William Mougayar

    I don’t know how many times I kept coming back to this post. GRIMLOCK- I haven’t seen so much original wisdom- simple yet profound, packed in one place, since Yogi Berra.We used to have Yogi Berraism. Now, this is GRIMLOCKISM. There is a FAKEGRIMLOCK in each of one us. Thanks for letting it come out in this jovial community. GRIMLOCKEAN YOURS, 

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      HOORAY!

    2. Mark Essel

      Same here William, had to share my favorite section on my blog and I haven’t felt the need to write in a month or two.

  127. Pete Griffiths

    This is so so so so so so so CCOOOL.FAKE GRIMLOCK – you rock!!!

  128. Pete Griffiths

    App Sumo has a voice, a personality.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      IT GOOD EXAMPLE.

  129. laurie kalmanson

    sometimes brands/products have a personality crisishttp://www.youtube.com/watc…http://en.wikipedia.org/wik

  130. Samuel Shih

    Lol this is a great depiction of the phrase “Keep It Simple Stupid” 

  131. Alex Hammer

    Very nice. Yes, the world as it is experienced is just an affirmation, or a mirror if you will, of one’s voice.

  132. vruz

    ME LOVE.WORK GOOD.WANT MORE.<3

  133. Paul Smith

    MUST. HAVE. BE THIS ONE. TSHIRT.

  134. Impulsive88

    API – means ‘FIRE’ in Malay where I come from ..Singapore/MalaysiaAcronyms do not make good INTERFACE…WHAT THAT?You either face to face, Interface to me means there is something in between..Modern day kids only face SCREEN ,,,in danger of suffering from SCREENOPHOBIAOR SCREENOPHRENIA…caused by too much INTER-NALISING of real feelings ..only express through INTER- ACTION with SCREEN…Loyalty misplaced..FIRE AWAY ACRONYMS AND TALK IN REAL LANGUAGE …ACRONYMS dont make language, the INTER-RUPT thoughts and feelings..no verb, no adjective, no noun, no emotion..

  135. obscurelyfamous

    @05e4e83c87a5700958fcb3efa8951a06:disqus We wish we could enlist your services full time as a strategist

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND GRIMLOCK.LET KNOW WHEN WANT HELP.

  136. scottythebody

    POST ALL-TIME CLASSIC. PEOPLE LIKE ALL-TIME CLASSIC.

  137. John Petersen

    1st – This post is amazing. Instant classic.2nd – In my mind, this post and the comments do more to enhance and strengthen the community than any feature could ever do. No disrespect to DISQUS, because I love the new labels for members but this place is amazing because of great content, people and a giant robot dinosaur.SMASH CAGE, LIGHT BARN ON FIRE.

  138. monapdx

    Ha, this is great. An acquaintance of mine posted a link to this on Facebook, I’ll have to thank him for doing so. I couldn’t agree more with the ideas expressed here in such simple, ridiculously funny ALL CAPS statements. As a freelance writer who mostly writes website content for highly saturated topics, adding personality to my work is essential in order to keep clients. Not to mention it’s imperative in order to create content that is 100% unique. In fact, I have recently started a blog over at http://www.letsgogreenlivin…, and we all know that “green” blogs are a dime a dozen these days. The topics discussed on these types of sites are a proverbial dead horse that some bloggers refuse to stop beating. So I have tried to incorporate as much of my personality into the writing as possible, if only to stand out among a very crowded crowd. Thanks for this great post, I’ll have to tweet one of the quotes. Not sure which one to pick yet though! They’re all priceless.

  139. Tracey Jackson

    Can be plugged into almost anything in life or business. 

  140. flash template

    Thanks for sharing such useful information. I think this is really a very nice post. Thanks for the great content!

  141. Easy Interior Design

    Sounds very inspiring! Thank you:)

  142. Dan Epstein

    Thanks @FakeGrimlock:twitter Awesome post. And thanks @fredwilson:twitter for giving him the spot.

  143. Just_one_mans_opinion

    I’ve been a silent observer of AVC for over 6 years, this is my first comment of any kind… inspired for two reasons1.) Fred Wilson’s recent post about commenting and why people do it or not2.) FAKE GRIMLOCK- every time he comments, I learn… and wanted to thank the community for that.Then, of course, I start to wonder about things like what different celebrities would say if they were a giant robot dinosaur; For instance Dr. Phil would say “NOT WHAT EAT, WHAT EAT YOU”

    1. ShanaC

      wow.  Anyway, welcome to the pit.  What do you think oprah would say?

      1. Just_one_mans_opinion

        Oprah already does talk like that:”car for you. Car for you. Car for you….” maybe fake grimlock IS Oprah

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          ME, GRIMLOCK, NOT OPRAH.PROBABLY.

  144. feargallkenny

    roast chicken under brick…Netflix chicken ran back into cage in burning barn to save pet rock qwikster. 

  145. Gustaf Josefsson

    Be bacon, not bread.Also, drink bacon flavored vodka… http://bakonvodka.com/That’s a joke, not an ad.

  146. Ccirulli

    can someone correct the grammar?

    1. Alex Murphy

      NO.

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        EXACTLY.

  147. Niccolo Brogi

    Nice.

  148. Dan Blumberg

    Yes, personality is key and there is no shortage of ways you can introduce it to your product.I blogged about this a few months back when that Richard Simmons Air New Zealand safety video went viral. Here was Air New Zealand taking the most boring part of any flight — the safety video that we’ve seen a gazillion times and no longer even watch anymore — and making it fun and worth paying attention to (and getting millions in free media in the process). http://www.dblums.com/2011/…Error messages are another easily overlooked area when personality can be inserted, with Twitter’s “Fail Whale” being the most prominent example.  You’re pissed that Twitter crapped out again, but then damn is that fail whale cute…  Personality.

  149. brendon david

    perfect.

  150. Ken Hillyer

    “SMASH CAGE, LIGHT BARN ON FIRE.  DO THAT, YOU WIN”…Classic. I mean, CLASSIC.

  151. danielgonzalez

    Wow, develop your “persona” and positioning in one fell swoop.

  152. Madeleine Cag

    lots of good, profound advice here. not crazy about the caveman tone, but gets message across in a new way.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME DINO!

  153. Erika Napoletano

    Kinda want to make out with the chicken…just a little bit – nothing too West Virginia-ish. Thanks for a laugh a great message and something I’m going to share the daylights out of with every client on the books.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      IT ONE HOT CHICKEN, ME ADMIT. ‘<

      1. Erika Napoletano

        Plucky. I like. And don’t correct the spelling/grammar. Some people need to get laid and complain about more important things. High five. If I did dino, I’d do you.

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          MAYBE TIME FOR NEXT TRIP TO COLORADO. ‘<YOU MAKE GOOD #BACONINJA.

          1. Erika Napoletano

            You say the sweetest things…

          2. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            ME, GRIMLOCK, #1 WITH THE LADIES.

          3. Tom Labus

            That was classic!!!

        2. Alex Murphy

          This could be an AVC first …

          1. Erika Napoletano

            You know, I believe in giving credit where due. Grimmy’s got my vote. I’ve followed Fred’s blog for quite some time – it just took a giant robot dinosaur to compel me to comment 😉

          2. Alex Murphy

            That is awesome.  But I was really referring to the match making service of AVC.

          3. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            ME INSPIRE!OR TERRIFY. MOSTLY SAME THING.

          4. Erika Napoletano

            For so long, there’s been nowhere for a girl looking for giant metal imaginary creatures to go to find her one true love. A VC might have just done something truly innovative: bridged the gap between species and imaginary/real. Kinda makes me want to write a business plan for it and take it to Disrupt.

          5. FAKE GRIMLOCK

            @RedheadWriting:disqus IT GOOD IDEA.DATING SITE FOR HOT SMART GIRLS AND IMAGINARY GIANT MONSTERS.VCS PROBABLY ALREADY WRITING CHECKS.

  154. ccc.candela

    Absolutely hilarious! And so true…

  155. Cliff McKinney

    Mission, values, enemy.  All sound like excellent elements for a minimum viable company *culture*.  I can’t think of a single world-changing product that hasn’t been opinionated, but taking sides–being opinionated–is a fearful venture.  It necessarily means that we’re giving one or more options up completely.  We stay in the barn because, amazing as it sounds, we truly believe we have more options available to us if we don’t.  “I’m in a cage, sure, but I *could* break out any time.”I absolutely love this post, but I think it should have been titled “minimum viable culture.”  Build a culture based on the tenants above and your product(s) will (genuinely) reflect it.  You won’t even have to try.         

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      CULTURE REQUIRE PERSONALITY.OR IT NOT HAPPEN.

  156. Melissa Hourigan

    Is this the best thing I have read in a long time. I had to print it out and hang each page on my wall. Brilliant and funny.

  157. Evan Bone

    I love how so much of Fake Grimlock’s post explains Fake Grimlock himself.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      ME, GRIMLOCK, SUBTLE.LIKE TRUCK TO FACE.

      1. panterosa,

        HURHUR. GRIM FUNNY. ME LIKE “SUBTLE” GRIM. ME WONDER WHAT SUBLIME GRIM IS.

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          WHY WOULD ME, GRIMLOCK WANT TO BE BELOW CITRUS FRUITS?

  158. Bonnie L. Nadri

    This is beautiful, you are genius, I like pie. 🙂

  159. Trish Anderton

    This is amazing. It helped me in my project and I’ve shared it with everyone I can think of who might be interested.

  160. FlavioGomes

    I feel like I just bathed in a tub of cheese whiz

  161. Bhavin Badheka

    Man this post has a ton of personality!!

  162. Ken

    Is this a Mr Miyagi lesson??

  163. Tom Labus

    This post is still alive.Maybe it should run in the background for a week? Can Disqus do that?

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      SO FAR IT WORKING.

  164. Naveed Lalani

    @FakeGrimlock:disqus is the “SMALL MIDWEST STARTUP” you refer to actually Groupon :D?Congrats on getting a guest post on here, pretty freaking epic dude(-et)! It was a great read. Looking forward to more details on your book and potentially future guest posts elsewhere and here. The book should be like The Alphabet of Manliness (http://alphabetofmanliness…., but for startups.Also, you should start commenting on UNCRUNCHED.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      1. NO COMMENT2. YES3. NO LIKE ARRINGTON

      1. Naveed Lalani

        I can only take your NO COMMENT as a yes.

        1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

          TAKE HOWEVER WANT.

  165. prosody Gabriel Croft Context

    Minimum Viable Personality = humanity?

  166. DrFun

    makes me more inclined now to make public founder’s desire to donate most of his own profits to urgent and important humanitarian products from the start (as opposed to waiting until a zillionnaire).–gary

  167. A Guest.

    Your caps are on

  168. StephaneCome

    ENTREPRENEUR LEARN GOOD LESSONENTREPRENEUR VERY FORTUNATE

  169. FAKE GRIMLOCK

    POST ON MINIMUM VIABLE PERSONALITY STILL GETTING COMMENTS. ME STILL RESPONDING TO THEM.

    1. fredwilson

      me still reading them and occasionally replying to them

      1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

        HURR HURR, NOW FRED TALK LIKE GRIMLOCK!

  170. The Business Paradox

    Funny but true, we forget even bad product experience, seldom bad people one!

  171. The Business Paradox

    Funny, but so true.  We might forget bad product experiences but not bad people one!  Individuals are the only part that counts, nothing else…BizParadox

  172. Ryan Mack

    Dangerous chicken image made a quick jump to #1 on my desktop wallpaper rankings, knocking off the previous top dog … http://bit.ly/mZNpEb

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      HOORAY!

  173. villa123

    A very important, and a very interesting point, is that what you hate is as important as what you love.  In order to be FOR something, you need to be AGAINST something.subjex

  174. Michael F. Martin

    Speechless.  I’m a lawyer, and I’ve printed out “HOW NOT BE BORING” and “NO BE CHICKEN” and put them up on my wall. Persuasive advocacy depends on personality as much as selling product.

  175. Michael F. Martin

    This really made my day today.  For some reason, I can’t help hearing Cookie Monster’s voice whenever I read FAKE GRIMLOCK’s posts.Am I alone?

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      IT MORE LIKE THIS, BUT MORE AWESOME: http://youtu.be/6R1m9fjdwjI

  176. Guest

    So business is a popularity contest. Just what I wanted… high school forever.

    1. FAKE GRIMLOCK

      NO.BUSINESS IS HUMAN BUSINESS.DO BUSINESS WITH HUMAN REQUIRE DO BUSINESS LIKE HUMAN.IF NO CAN DO, FIND HUMAN TO PARTNER WITH.

  177. Kopi

    Wow…amazing concept!

  178. Steve Powell

    GRIMLOCK NOT FAKE; GRIMLOCK REAL!

  179. Bill Richards

    No one going to eat this chickenNew mantra

  180. Ela Madej

    OMG, this is such a great post @FakeGrimlock:disqus , one of those people should go back to from time to time just to be reminded (I bookmarked it haha!)

  181. ShadrachSmith

    Dear Chris Jennings,You are a genius, I am not.However, I am the #7 rated commenter on Disqus according to a little gray box in my National Journal posts.1) what are the metrics?2) where do I find the other six?I have been posting for twenty years, I always thought is am the best there is, Where Are Those Other Six?

  182. Daron Ballard

    Brilliant.. simply brilliant.  Tell’m Grimlock! 

  183. FAKE GRIMLOCK

    ME, GRIMLOCK ON TWITTER. COMMENT ON BLOGS.SOME GREAT, LIKE AVC.COM.

  184. Carl Rahn Griffith

    FG, is your source code as concise as your messages here? 🙂

  185. FAKE GRIMLOCK

    “GRIMLOCKIAN”? ME LIKE.

  186. FAKE GRIMLOCK

    YES.IT FIT INSIDE 8 BIT BRAIN.

  187. Carl Rahn Griffith

    Wow. Never any need to pop the call stack, then…. Cool 🙂

  188. FAKE FAKE GRIMLOCK

    >IT FIT INSIDE 8 BIT BRAINASSEMBLY (LANGUAGE, FOR THOSE NOT KNOW). GOT TO BE ASSEMBLY. ME MEAN YOUR PROGRAMS. FIT WITH YOU BEING ROBOT WITH 8 BIT BRAIN. (8 BIT BRAIN MEAN LESS PROCESSOR POWER AND LESS MEMORY).ASSEMBLY MOST EFFICIENT LANGUAGE – WHEN WRITTEN BY EXPERTS. MORE THAN C EVEN.ALSO ASSEMBLY MORE CLOSE TO MACHINE (AND YOU MACHINE TOO). THAT WHY IT CALLED MACHINE LANGUAGE (AFTER TRANSLATION).BUT YOU VERY SMART MACHINE.ME LIKE.